#1 I’ve Been Told

(Trigger Warning, also very personal but I am open to talk about it if you have questions)

I have been told that my mental illness comes from the chemicals in my brain

My low self worth from neuroplasticity

I have been told by some that none of my problems are real

That they are “all in your head”

Of course they’re all in my head how else would it be MENTAL

i have been told i am not valid in how i cope

i have been told i am not alone

i have been told this so many times it doesn’t mean anything

i don’t know what is helping me

the medication?

the therapy?

Myself?

when I encounter a realm where I can shed all of my beliefs

where the negative self talk dissipates from existence

why would I not grasp a hold on this world and dive headfirst

dive in headfirst, never looking back

I can search for answers outside of the psychiatrist office

I can find myself before someone else defines me

I can find myself before the hospital bed does

People have told me nobody can truly “fix” me other than myself

This is true, I define my existence and no longer do I define my existence as quiet and meaningless

Now I define my existence as hopeful, bright and impactful.

Even when i don’t believe those words I still repeat them everyday.

Cogito

Ergo

Sum

i think therefore I am

I think therefore I am enough

I think therefore I exist,

and I will keep existing