August 2021 Musings
On seeking status, signalling, work and having an ordinary life
Hey there,
August 2021 has passed by so quickly again. In another 4 months, we’ll meet 2022. I still have 14 leave days from work to take to go on a break. While holidays are welcome, I simply do not have anywhere to go….
I’ve picked up one or maybe two hobbies this month. We bought a $600 carver surf skate this month on a whim. I have never skateboarded before so it was my first time learning how to surf skate. I was so excited that I could finally ride and was glad that my wedding was over. My first time on a skateboard was not easy and I fell with some scratches on my elbow and hand.
Because we only had one board, Jingles and I had to take turns. So I started to pick up inline skates, I had an underutilized rollerblade that I’ve gotten 7 years ago. I was not proficient at all, but it’s fun for me to relearn something and getting better at it.
Thank you for reading,
Ying Ying
Quote of the month
Mitch Albom on time:
“Birds are not late. A dog does not check its watch. Deer do not fret over passing birthdays. Man alone measures time. Man alone chimes the hour. And, because of this, man alone suffers a paralyzing fear that no other creature endures. A fear of time running out.”
Challenges & Learnings of the month
My Youtube Journey
I often think about what made me started. And how much I have benefitted from putting myself out there. This video from The Diary of a CEO summarizes it perfectly.
I want to become a better communicator, communicate ideas, sharpen how we speak and present on camera. In the process, I was able to learn by explaining in a video, expand my experience and knowledge by spending time doing research about the topics discussed. Other skills that I’ve thought of are sales, strategy, marketing and branding, content, understanding what people want and negotiation. Because everything is hands-on, from idea generation, writing the script, filming, editing and optimizing after upload
Bonus, I was able to meet new people who have the same interest as me and expand my network.
The only weak point is that I’m embarrassed about it. And I have not shared it with my friends. Though some people discovered it, I am usually too shy about it. It’s hard for me to feel proud on what I have because it’s not anything to be proud of, but yet I do know that I put a lot of hard work into it.
What I have been reading and consuming
On Seeking Status and Signaling
Most of our everyday actions can be traced back to some form of signalling or status-seeking and our brains deliberately hide this fact from us and others (self-deception).
So we think and say that we do something for a specific reason, but in reality, there’s a hidden, selfish motive: to show off and increase our social status. Some examples are consumption, charity and education.
People often act in the interest of increasing social status within their tribe. In a way, we want to be accepted and loved by the people around us. If we are brought up in a society or community that values school grades and money, we would use that as a gauge on how we are ‘performing’ in life.
And because of that, we aim to be special and extraordinary because that is where we think we can find joy.
Why work is toxic — Spirited Away
Work has always been part of our identity. Most of the time, the first thing that you typically ask someone is that — “What do you do?”, “What is your job?”.
Or we would introduce our name and then our job.
This question and answer is a process of signalling our social status.
As such, I’m always asking myself what does work for me should be? Am I losing my soul? What am I signalling to others whenever I indulge in a conversation?
I loved how this video breaks down the story of Spirited Away by Studio Ghibli on how we are changed by modern times and metric of success.
I’m very thankful for the life I have right now. I don’t have to do things that I don’t want to do. My work is fun and enjoyable. And I have time to learn, read and write. I think I understand what it means to have enough though I need to be constantly reminded in this hyper-connected world.
I wrote this here first!
