(Un)Happy Birthday to Me

This year, I hid my birth date from social media, and here’s what happened.

My birthday is on December 30, also known as the black hole between “I’m still too full from Christmas” and “I’m getting absolutely wasted on New Year’s Eve”. No one is ever in town or has any willpower for an additional celebration left in them, so I usually spend the day on my own. That’s depressing. I also get a lot of generic Happy Birthday’s on Facebook, which is even more depressing.

This year, I hid my birth date from social media and this is what happened.

At the beginning of the day, I felt quite good about myself. A few of my closest acquaintances sent me private messages on Facebook, so did my mom, and my dad texted me through Viber. My sister reverted to Whatsapp and sent me a little video of her dog with a bow on his head (the dog did not look impressed, I promise). This is when disappointment started creeping in: seriously, mom and dad, not even a phone call? I get it, my parents are trying to stay on the social media bandwagon and whatnot but is it really too much to ask for an actual telephone conversation with your kid on their birthday? I think not.

Later on, I made it to the office where my coworkers sang a song to me and gave me a thoughtful gift. They were all very sweet (I couldn’t ask for better team mates, I swear) and I felt slightly better.

Still, I kept checking my Facebook throughout the day hoping that someone would remember it’s my bloody birthday. Nobody did.

By the end of the day, exactly 2 people had picked up the phone to wish me a happy birthday, a few more had sent me private messages on Facebook, there was no sign of my best friend (who has since been demoted to just an acquaintance) and I was the saddest I had ever been in my life.

I was sad not because people had forgotten about my birthday, in fact I kind of expected this (I myself can’t remember a single person’s birthday and rely heavily on Facebook for reminders).
I was sad because I realized I actually wanted all those generic, meaningless birthday wishes I would have gotten had I kept my birth date visible on social media. I missed the fake attention. The blatant awareness that social media had changed me for the worse hit me in the face and I couldn’t have been more disappointed in myself.

I sighed and did what someone of my shallow statute would do: took it to Instagram and Facebook to rant and guilt trip anyone willing to listen.

A few days later, I am over this, and I have a single resolution for this year: stay off social media and keep remind myself it makes me unhappy.

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