Attachment Theory & Beyond: Homo Amor Evolves the Blessing of the Father

A Note to the Reader

This piece is a lightly edited transcript of a live talk given by Dr. Marc Gafni on the weekly broadcast One Mountain, Many Paths, founded by Gafni and his evolutionary partner Barbara Marx Hubbard. Thus, the style of the piece is the spoken word and not a formal essay.

Edited and prepared for publication by Krista Josepha and Elena Maslova-Lenin.

It is the fourth part of Meditations on Seduction. Read part 1 and part 2, part 3 and part 4 here.

Last week it was Father’s Day in many places in the world. So I want to be, with permission, in the mode of Father, of the blessing of the Father — and we all get to be and need to be fathers to each other — so I want to just take a moment… just to thank some people.

Thanking the One Mountain team as a Blessing of the Father

I want to thank the people that are so involved in making One Mountain happen every week for all of us, because it’s just a stunning group of people. Everyone does so much in other areas, I am now talking specifically about people showing up here in this space of One Mountain.

No one is doing it for any financial gain, although financial gain is legitimate. But everyone’s volunteering and pouring in. But volunteer is the wrong word, we are on staff at this revolution; we are fellows of the revolution.

  • The work, the energy, and the delight that Kristina Tahel pours into the Dharma recapitulation every week is stunning, and we are in your debt. She takes the exact words that we used the week before, but reweaves their order, and in that sense, is writing her Unique Self version of the Symphony of the Dharma.
  • Claire and Chahat come and hold the space for several hours a week, to kind of hold the space of One Mountain.
  • Kerstin Zohar held One Mountain for many years, and then spent some time deep in meditation, and she’s coming back to join in the holding of One Mountain.
  • Two very, very, very special people, Jamie and Jacqueline, who are just brilliant. They work on so many dimensions of replays and editing and creating, and there’s so many steps that they do that are invisible, and it’s their commitment. S Jamie and Lady Jacqueline are just doing such incredible, incredible work.
  • Terry Nelson holds us every week, and Tom, we’ve missed him for a few weeks. But Tom with Terry hold this every week in our meeting afterwards, which is such a crazy and critical and beautiful meeting.
  • David is resonating the Evolutionary Love Code every week. David is on a flight today, so he won’t be resonating the code this week. But David’s there, the meeting before and the meeting after — I’m talking specifically about One Mountain — resonating and holding and picking and working on the codes, etc. He’s taken on so much in that.
  • Then the person who then animates and moves the whole thing, and holds all of those pieces and integrates them, is of course our Executive Director, Krista Josepha. Ken, who showed up for a year and a half.
  • Of course, Kristina Kincaid, who’s shown up for years in so many One Mountain meetings.
  • I want to specifically add one piece of pride, this new dyad in the force, this new team has emerged, which is Elena and Krista, who are actually doing this very, very important work of taking the sensemaking that we did, and transforming it into these Medium articles.
  • Then around that, you’ve got Kristina Amelong and Timothy Paul Aryeh, who are kind of holding this very, very critical space, which is working on turning these evolutionary sensemakings into books so we’ll actually have these; these will be in culture.
  • Benjamin, who’s been with us for the last year holding this critical space, and just being present in One Mountain.
  • JoySee has done this brilliant job of doing the first level of teaching us what it means and how we need to edit and how it needs to happen. We’ve learned from what works and what doesn’t work, and what’s perfect and what’s imperfect. That huge dedication and commitment and depth and skill of JoySee opened up the space.

So just the amount of energy that’s poured into this One Mountain is just so incredibly stunning, and I just want to be just in deep bow. If I can, with your permission, to give you the blessing of the Father.

The blessing of the Father is: I am proud of you, I’m just really proud of you.

Elena Maslova-Levin. Rembrandt post-Cezanne. After Rembrandt’s The Return of the Prodigal Son.

We all need to know that actually, Reality is proud of us, and we need to do things to make Reality proud.

We should want Dad to be proud of us.

Yes, there are pathological ways in which that occurs. That is, of course, true, and there’s very, very important work that’s done in healing the pathologies of the fathers who weren’t fathers and children who got caught up in broken attachment models.

One of the great innovations of the last hundred years is understanding where this goes wrong, where mothers and fathers go wrong, and where we’re shaped or mis-shaped by early attachment. That’s a very critical field.

One of my closest friends, a Board member and a close friend, Lori, is one of the most brilliant trauma therapists in the world, and she is a great healer in this realm of trauma. So deep recognition for that dimension.

But the reason there is trauma is because mother and father matter so much. A mother and father matter so much.

Sometimes we’ve got the exact right father and the exact right mother, and it worked perfectly.

But generally, it’s imperfect, generally there’s a lack of attunement.

For many of us here, it was hard. We were hurt, and maybe our parents were hurt; our parents had parents.

We need to know that the role of fathering and the role of mothering, in the new emergent world and a new world of evolutionary intimacy, is not just the mother and the father. We need to be mothers and fathers to each other.

So with permission, everyone, just with complete humility, if you’ll give me permission, to the people I just mentioned, to give you the blessing of the Father.

I am so wildly proud of you, and proud of who you are and proud of what you do!

It’s something that I don’t say often enough.

— We’re here taking responsibility for the evolution of the source code.
— We’re here taking responsibility at this time between worlds, at this time between stories, poised between utopia and dystopia.

I’m so proud of the way we are stepping in and the way we’re taking this commitment on.

I’m just so overwhelmingly filled with joy and pride. And when I say pride, it’s not arrogance. It’s what the Tibetan Buddhists called divine pride. We are proud of each other, we give each other the blessing of the Father.

There’s nothing like it.

We need to be fathers and mothers to each other…

I want to go into the energy today on Father’s Day of the Blessing of the Father, and we’re going to watch a clip. I’m going to ask everyone if you can, just to watch the clip, watch the faces, watch the relationship. It’s a short clip of about three and a half minutes. Don’t worry about the words so much. The words are beautiful, but they are not the key. The key is the music. The key is the faces. It’s a father and son. It’s called Fall on Me by Andrea Bocelli & Matteo Bocelli. Take us inside, if you can.

The father’s face just lit up! Who could see that? He just lit up.

And this is a complex relationship between the two of them, it’s not an easy relationship. It’s got Lions & tigers & bears, oh my!

Andrea Bocelli is a larger than life human being, and he is calling his son to perform with him, and creating great demands on his son. There was a whole question about whether they should make this clip or not, because he was in the middle of his music studies, and his father didn’t want him to take off any time and he wanted him to actually show up in his musical studies in this very, very radical way.

It’s not easy.

It is not all sweetness and light.

  • There’s a demand of the Father, and there’s the pride of the Father; the blessings of the Father: I’m proud of you.
  • There’s this way in which the father and the mother are the very air we breathe. It’s so deep: the very air we breathe.

For so many of us, this is indeed a bittersweet day. It’s a day with so many dimensions; we may have lost our father, we may have lost our mother, or we may have never quite had them.

So let’s hold this moment, and let’s be fathers and let’s be mothers.

Yeah, like that!

Beyond the Root of All Human Suffering

Now holding the space of the blessing of the Father and the blessing of the Mother, I want to take two steps with you.

Here’s our code for today. We’re going to do a code for today, which is a new code. Next week, we are going to return to confession of greatness. But this week, we are going to create a simple code, and we’re going to create it right now.

Here’s this week’s Evolutionary Love Code:We all need the blessing of the Father. We all need the love of the Father.We all need the blessing of the Mother. We all need the love of the Mother. BECAUSE the universe is a love story, and at the beginning of our lives, we experience our parents as the entire universe.And your Mother and Father are not limited to your biological Mother and Father.We all have the capacity to give each other the Blessing of the Father and the Blessing of the Mother. We are all Mothers and Fathers to each other. We can also be Mothers and Fathers to ourselves.

We all need the blessing of the Father. We all need the love of the Father. We all need the blessing of the Mother. We all need the love of the Mother.

Because the universe is a love story, and at the beginning of our lives, we experience our parents as the entire universe.

Okay, you get that? Wow!

Now I want to add something to the code, part two of the code. We’re writing this code together, let’s do this together.

I want to just say one word. If you are new to One Mountain, and you’ve never been here before, one of the things that we do here in One Mountain is,

We work out the next steps of the great story of value, the Dharma, which is rooted in First Principles and First Values, in order to actually evolve the source code of consciousness and culture.

Because we understand that the root cause of catastrophic risk and existential risk, and the root cause of what we call ordinary suffering — from obesity, to suicide, to mental breakdown, to evil in all of its manifold forms — the root cause of all of that is a breakdown in a story of value.

We don’t live in a story of value rooted in First Principles and First Values, and that’s the ultimate root cause of all the generator functions of existential risk.

The root cause of the generator functions of existential risk is precisely the breakdown in the story of value. So I want to see if we can, together, evolve this notion of Father’s Day and Mother’s Day, and this notion of parenting, and root it deeply in this larger story of value.

People of the lie

Scott Peck wrote very beautifully about the tragedies of evil that appear within families in the first hundred pages of a book called People of the Lie. It’s actually one of the greatest books ever written. It was little noticed and misunderstood.

The book was called People of the Lie. The first hundred pages of the book are about the people of the lie, within families when parents go pathological, and they don’t love their children — but also within social groups.

Spiritual teachers can be people of the lie.
Bloggers can be people of the lie.
Cultural critics can be people of the lie.

This happens when people have this fundamental core emptiness inside them, and that emptiness is driving everything. In other words, underneath the surface personality, there’s a fundamental emptiness, because the person was, in some sense, violated.

They didn’t receive the blessing of the father or the blessing of the mother,
and then something got so contracted,
so shriveled,
so frozen,
that the person froze into a mask,
in which survival and looking good,
or survival and a certain kind of public recognition became everything.
In order to achieve that, they’re willing to do almost anything.

That’s what underlies Jihads in all of their forms, and all “holy wars” — whether it’s in their Joseph McCarthyite forms, or whether it’s all of the ways that people move to hurt each other under the guise of being a rescuer.

In the famous victim triangle, you’ve got a predator, you’ve got a victim, and a rescuer — but actually, the roles are often confused:

  • the person who’s setting themselves up as the rescuer may often be the predator,
  • and the person who is setting themselves up as the victim might actually be the victimizer. It’s more complex.

This is what the Drama Triangle in psychology points out.

All of the pathologies that happen that are the root of all human suffering — they’re the root of all war, they’re the root of all breakdown: mental breakdown, social breakdown, of the worst kind — come from people who somehow lost their capacity to act, and be, and feel out of the field of value and love.

They got empty inside at a certain moment, and they lost themselves, often at a particular moment, and then they began to loathe themselves, and to hate themselves, and eventually they became what Peck called “People of the lie.”

Then they express themselves in malice.

Joseph Berke, a key student of RD Laing, and a dear colleague, wrote a book called The Tyranny of Malice, about the pathological versions of the father and the pathological versions of the mother.

So that’s real.

And, at the same time — oh my God — there are so many gorgeous fathers, and we can be fathers for each other, and we can be mothers for each other.

We can give each other the blessing of the Father, and we can give each other the blessing of the mother.

We are all mothers and fathers to each other

Evolutionary Love Code:
We all need the blessing of the Father. We all need the love of the Father.
We all need the blessing of the Mother. We all need the love of the Mother. BECAUSE the universe is a love story, and at the beginning of our lives, we experience our parents as the entire universe.And your Mother and Father are not limited to your biological Mother and Father.We all have the capacity to give each other the Blessing of the Father and the Blessing of the Mother. We are all Mothers and Fathers to each other. We can also be Mothers and Fathers to ourselves.

I want to evolve this notion of the mother and father.

So the first evolution, the next part of the code is: And your mother and father are not limited to your biological mother and father.

This is unbelievably important!

We all have the capacity to give each other the blessing of the father and the blessings of the mother.

That’s the first evolution.

We are all mothers and fathers to each other.

Decoding the Solomon Matrix

In the Hebrew mystical tradition, if you read the Song of Solomon, the Beloved is sister, brother, father, mother; the Beloved has many faces.

  • We track the Beloved in the classical romantic relationship, but actually we need to be Beloveds to each other. That’s what we call Outrageous Lovers. Part of the emergence of Homo amor is that we are Beloveds to each other.
  • But Beloveds to each other doesn’t mean that it is frozen in a romantic context. That’s one context, and it’s an important context. But too often, that’s ordinary love. Too often, the romantic context is a strategy of the ego, seeking comfort and security, which is reactive to that which happens to it. But love that’s not ordinary love, that’s Outrageous Love, emerges from within and takes on many wondrous guises.

So we can be everything to each other at once:
we can be Beloved,
we can be lover,
and we can be brother,
we can be sister,
we can be father,
we can be mother,
we can be uncle;
we need to be many things to each other.

When we lock ourselves in one relationship, we lose the power of The Universe: A Love Story.

That’s why the Song of Solomon, the Song of Songs, if you look at Chapter 8, for example, moves between the lover and beloved. In the Song of Songs, they move between brother and sister, and father and mother.

Song of Songs Chapter 8

I wish you were my brother,
who nursed at my mother’s breast; then,
if I met you outdoors,
I could kiss you,
and no one would look down on me.

I just want to invite us now, at this moment:

Let us be brothers and sisters to each other.

But particularly today, let us be fathers and mothers to each other.

We can give each other the blessing of the Father and the blessing of the mother.

It’s huge!

Can we feel that?

Who’s willing to be fathers and mothers to each other?

To show up in that stunning way for each other and with each other?

Wow!

You are welcome in the Universe!

Most of us on this call, and most people in the world, are the product of imperfect parenting.

Because parenting is imperfect, and some of us may have been the product of really brutal parenting. So, do the work:

  • do the psychological work,
  • do the therapeutic work,
  • do the traumatic work.

That’s critically important, and there is no bypass road.

But actually, it’s not about that. You have to liberate yourself from the notion that there’s this one person, your mother or father, who’s the pharaoh in your life, and if they did it wrong, you can’t liberate yourself.

That’s not true.

You are a Unique Self, and you can recover your Unique Self.

Your Unique Self is the realization that:

I’m not just called by the past.
I’m not only defined by the memory of my past,
I’m called by the memory of my future.

The memory of my future is in the faces of all the mothers and fathers that call me forward,
and are desperate to be proud of me,
and need my service,
and see me and invite me and recognize me
and choose me and desire my depth
and adore me.

Download first 4 Chapters of Your Unique Self HERE

As mothers and fathers, we have to adore each other.

It’s not enough to love each other, we have to adore each other.

What do we say to each other?

We say to each other what the mother and father need to say to their child in the ideal world, which is:

Welcome! You’re welcome in the universe.

You see, the reason mothers and fathers matter so much is because,

— the universe is a love story, and that love story is a story of value.
— It’s a story of evolving value and evolving love.
— It’s an Evolutionary Love story.
— But love is not just a social construction.
— Love is the central value of Kosmos.

So mother and father transmit to us two things:

  1. One, the experience of love, of being held, of being welcome.
  2. Two, the experience that we are irreducibly valuable, but in a field of value; we are irreducibly valuable in a field of value which is Kosmos. Kosmos is a field of value, and to be a Unique Self is to be an irreducibly unique expression of that field of Eros and value.

In the ideal world, that is what mother and father remind us of. We look at the faces of mother and father, and we see our value, and we see the Welcome sign.

But that Welcome sign, brothers and sisters, fathers and mothers, friends and lovers, that Welcome sign is not actually hung around the neck, in a limited way, of my biological mother and father.

So yes, do the work.

It is critical to do the work, you can’t bypass the work.

Do the deep work — the attachment work, let’s call it, the re-fathering and the re-mothering work — which is the best that modern psychology has to offer in its best forms… There’s a lot of corrupted forms of it, but its best forms are brilliant, shamanic, stunning, utterly necessary.

But once you’ve done that work, give it up!

In other words, let go of your attachment to reliving that story again, and again, and again. Not in a way that’s healthy, but in a way that you get into a recursive loop that you can’t get out of.

Because going through the story again and again becomes not your Eros, not your healing, but your pseudo-eros. It becomes an addiction.

Step into the realization that you are Unique Self, and you are called by the future itself.

That the Welcome Home sign is not chained to the neck of your mother and father biologically. The Welcome Home sign is actually posted all over Reality.

— It’s posted in beauty.
— It’s posted in color.
— It’s posted in elegance.
— It’s posted in ethnos.
— It’s posted in creativity.
— It’s posted in your unique ethos and your unique creativity.

Your very uniqueness, your very experience of yourself as an irreducibly unique expression of the larger field of value, is itself a Welcome Home sign!

When you actually get …

— your infinite importance,
— your unique contribution,
— the unique quality of intimacy that you bring to Reality,
— the unique quality of being and becoming that you bring to Reality,
— the unique gift that you have to give to your unique circle of intimacy and influence, that can be given by you and you alone

Then you realize that…

The very experience of being a Unique Self and recognizing yourself as Unique Self is a Welcome Home sign in Kosmos.

That actually, not only are we all mothers and fathers to each other, but we can also be mothers and fathers to ourselves.

Oh, my God!

We can also be mothers and fathers to ourselves.

The Welcome Home sign in Kosmos is the field of value itself

Now let’s go even deeper, we’re ready to go even deeper. Let’s see if we can take this another step.

Happy Father’s Day, everyone. Happy Mother’s Day, for those who missed it. We’re going to do Mother’s and Father’s Day together here. Let’s go to the next step.

And the Welcome Home sign is not only from us to each other. It’s not only us to ourselves. It’s not only we can be mothers and fathers to each other and we need to be mothers and fathers to ourselves.

But actually, the Welcome Home sign in Kosmos is the field of value itself.

The field of value has many disguises.

But the blessing of the father begins with the recognition that as a Unique Self, you, my son, you, my daughter –

  • You have a unique contribution.
  • You are a unique value of Kosmos that’s needed by Kosmos.
  • You are part of this larger field of value, and that we need you to show up.
  • You are part of the team; you are part of Team Humanity.
  • You are part of Team Human, and Team Human needs you deeply!
  • We are on Team Human, and Team Human needs you deeply.

In other words, it’s not enough to have a good father and mother.

The field of value itself is the mother and father

I had a beautiful night a few nights ago with a close friend, a brother of mine who’s literally my family, this past Thursday night, and we were talking. He’s a great dad, and I happen to know his son who’s a great guy; I’m having a great time studying with his son. I’d have no chance to study with his son without the gorgeous fathering that he did, and obviously the mothering that his wife did.

And, you can be the best father in the world, but it’s insufficient.

Because if you are the best father in the world…

and you send your son or your daughter into a world in which there’s no story of value and there’s no First Principles and First Values, and there’s a postmodern deconstruction of value, and there’s a deconstruction of meaning…

Then your son goes off to college — which of course you pay for –
and they get downloaded this notion that actually, value is not real,
and stories are not real,
and the only grand narrative is that there’s no grand narrative.

Then it gets confusing,
and it gets depressing.
Then addiction sets in,
and breakdown sets in.

So we need a second form of fathering.

That’s what we are doing.

We are creating here at the Center, through the Great Library, a new incarnation of the father and the mother.

The Great Library is about Unique Self Recovery.

It is about the story of value that we live in.

The field of value itself, and love/Eros, which is at the center of the field of value, is the mother and father. In other words, there’s a mother and father beyond the biological mother and father: all of us, and each of us for ourselves.

But then, there’s a mother and father beyond individual human beings.

The very structure of the Living Universe itself is a field of value and a field of Eros, which is the mother and father.

It’s not that the father is value and the mother is Eros — but the father and mother are Yin and Yang: interpenetrating fields of value and Eros.

So I am fathered by the story of value that calls me to my best self, that demands — and we’ll talk about this next week — that I confess my greatness.

I’m held by that field, by the mother.

I’m held in that field, which is not just a field of love. It’s not enough to have a field of love.

Love by itself doesn’t do it unless love is a value of Kosmos.

You have to recognize and feel that love is not a social construction of Reality, it’s not an egoic move. This love that I am experiencing, that’s flowing through the story of value, is the Eros that drives all of Kosmos.

We live in a CosmoErotic Universe.

  • Eros animates the field of value,
  • and Eros animates the field of love,
  • and it generates in us the field of dreams.

Can you feel that, everyone?

Wow!

We have to liberate ourselves from the idolatry of mother and father

Part of evolving the source code of consciousness and culture is, we have to liberate ourselves from the idolatry of mother and father.

For 2,000 years, we didn’t take mother and father, and what happened in those early relationships, seriously enough, and then attachment theory burst forth as a great revelation, as an evolutionary breakthrough, as a critical new understanding.

That’s beautiful and necessary.

But then, we can idolize that new breakthrough and say everything is about the mother and father.

No, it’s not, and everything is not about one lifetime.

It’s not about one mother and father.

Not only we can reparent each other, and reparent ourselves, but

  • Reality reparents us;
  • Goodness, Truth, and Beauty reparent us,
  • The story of value reparents us.

The Universe: A Love Story is actually holding us.

My teacher Mordechai Leiner of Izbica wrote, he said:

Every place you fall, you fall into Her arms.

Can you feel that, my friends?

There are ways that we have to reparent each other, and there are ways that this structure of value lives in culture.

How are we doing so far?
Who can feel this?
Wow, we can feel this!

There are different vehicles of transmission. So I want to just feel one thing together with you,

— which is that what we’re doing here in One Mountain Many Paths
— at this moment in which we’re poised between utopia and dystopia,
— at this moment of existential and catastrophic risk and massive ordinary suffering…

Which is…

  • The recognition that as ordinary suffering is happening, and as human brutality is happening, there is also unimaginable beauty.
  • There’s so much more beauty than there is ugliness; we only recognize it’s ugly because it’s contrasted with the beauty.
  • There are actually billions of people who are working, and toiling, and efforting, and pouring themselves into goodness.

People need hope.

Hope is a memory of the future,
and hope comes from the realization that Reality Herself is the Mother and the Father.

We need She,
The Goddess,
the Great Mother,
who holds us,
and we need Avinu Malkeinu:
the Great Father,
who holds us.

  • For 2,000 years, we distorted the Father in all sorts of exoteric versions of religion, in which you only got the blessing of the Father if you fulfilled a particular set of ritual requirements, and you alienated yourself from your body, and you denied that which was essential to you in multiple ways. So religions hijacked the authentic, human, cosmic structure of the blessings of the Father.
  • Then in many ways, today, in the new age, we’ve gone for the blessing of the mother.
  • We have rejected the father entirely, and we’ve adopted the blessing of the mother.
  • But the blessing of the mother is, it’s about unconditional love, but without any expectation, without the demands of value, without the demand of living my Unique Self and giving my unique gift and confessing my greatness, which we’ll talk about next week.

We need both.

We need to uplevel the blessing of the mother, and we need to uplevel the blessing of the father.

  • We need to evolve the source code of consciousness and culture, which means we need to evolve the blessing of the father and we need to evolve the blessing of the mother.
  • The mother loves not with ordinary love. The mother’s love is the expression of the Outrageous Love of Kosmos moving through the mother, whether it’s the biological mother — or it’s the field of Reality itself.
  • The blessing of the father is the value and love of Kosmos moving through the father, whether it’s the biological father — or it’s the field of Reality itself.
  • Reality Herself is the Mother and the Father.

So when Cohen sings his prayer, the holy and the broken, Hallelujah, he’s singing to the mother and the father, to the field of Kosmos that holds us.

The reason we come back to that song every week is because he’s not only speaking about the biological.

Cohen is actually emerging from his lineage, which I share with him, which speaks about this; Kashmir Shaivism does it in its way, and Sufism does it in its way, and mystical Christianity does it in its way.

We need to evolve those traditions.

Because in order to tell the New Story of value,

— we need to integrate the best of the traditional world (the premodern world),
— the best of the modern,
— and the best of the postmodern world,
— into a New Story of value in which God and Goddess, the Father and the Mother
— not as Mr. or Mrs. Santa Claus, although Mr. or Mrs. Santa Claus would be human expressions of that field
— but actually, the field Itself,
— Gaia Herself is the living Mother,
— and the field of value is the living Father.

That field of value calls us and lives in us.

In the old world, and much of the world we would watch in the Western, you’d see kind of the lone, rugged individual, the man, or the woman who was in the homestead holding the children.

So let’s liberate those worlds from their gender stereotypes. And, let’s also reclaim them.

We need mother and the father, and they need to live in us. But they also live in Reality Herself; Reality Herself is the Mother and the Father.

  • Abba: Father, Father, Father, my father, my father! I’ve got to be able to turn and cry out to my father, and I can’t exhaust my father in the biological father.
  • And I’ve got to be able to cry to my mother. Mother, mother, mother! Mother, carry me! Mother, hold me! Hold me, mother!
  • I’ve got to know that every place I fall, I fall into His arms, and every place I fall, I fall into Her arms.

That’s what Unique Self Recovery is about. It is why we’re creating a Unique Self Institute. It’s why we’re creating Unique Self Recovery, which we have been working on for seven years.

It’s an expression of the Unique Self Institute and an expression of One Mountain.

Because to recover my Unique Self is to realize that my father and mother love me madly,
and my father and mother are the field of the Living Universe itself.

The universe is magical.
The universe is alive,
and it’s alive with the quality of the Infinity of Intimacy.
The Infinity of Intimacy is not just Lover.
It’s not just brother and sister.

Oh my God,
the Infinity of Intimacy is the Mother and the Father
that hold us in our holy and our broken Hallelujah.

Wow!

Outrageous Love Festival

Friends, we’re going to get together this summer.

The Outrageous Love Festival is our laboratory for the Dharma, where we spend seven days together and we go deep in an ecstatic field of practice, of integrity, of Unique Self.

  • There’s no guru; we’re standing against the guru, with all due respect for the guru. But the guru has to be the field of value itself.
  • At the center of our community is not Barbara Marx Hubbard, it’s not Marc Gafni. At the center of our community is a field of value and a field of ethics, which calls every Unique Self to play their instrument in the Unique Self Symphony. Just to feel that!
  • We’ve all got to work on this through our own sacred autobiography, and we’re going to work in the summer also on sacred autobiography.
  • Every one of us has to do the work with our own particular mother and father, step one.
  • Then we have to actually emerge as we do that work, to actually become mother and father ourselves, whether that’s biologically.

I just spent an incredible week with my son, and we’ll talk about it maybe next week. I want to talk about that. I just spent an incredible four-day trip with my son, Zion; we did a father-son trip in San Francisco, which was just beyond imagination beautiful. So we’ll get to that next week; we’ll get to The Five Principles of Baseball Dharma next week, and we’ll get to Confessions of Greatness next week.

But for now, I just want to be with you in this mother and father moment.

We need to be mother and father to each other, and we need to be mother and father to ourselves.

But we also need to realize that in telling the New Story of value,

— in writing the Great Library,
— and creating One Mountain,
— in being the revolution,
— we’re weaving the field of mother and father,
— which is the quality of Reality herself.

In other words, we actually become part of the field that holds us;

— the field of mother and father which is the field of Gaia Herself,
— which is the field of value Himself,
— which is God/Goddess which holds us, which is beyond us.

Not a kind of trite New Age, I am God.

Just relax, buddy!

God is God; Goddess is Goddess.
God is so much larger than us.
And — not contradiction, paradoxically — I participate in that field, that’s actually true, and I weave the field.

On this Father’s Day, we’re weaving the field of the Father. We’re crying out to Father, and Father cries out to us and says: Be Father with me.

When we write this New Story of value, rooted in First Values and First Principles, we’re reweaving the field of value: the field of the mother and the father.

That’s we’re going to do this summer at the Outrageous Love Festival, and I’m insanely ecstatic to be with you.

Outrageous Love Festival

Today we celebrated Father’s Day together. We did not only celebrate, but we evolved Father’s Day; we evolved Mother’s Day.

Oh my God, thank you!

Happy Father’s Day.

Happy Mother’s Day!

All of us, mothers and fathers to each other, to Reality, and as part of the field of father and mother.

Thank you.

Evolutionary Love Code:
We all need the blessing of the Father. We all need the love of the Father.
We all need the blessing of the Mother. We all need the love of the Mother. BECAUSE the universe is a love story, and at the beginning of our lives, we experience our parents as the entire universe.And your Mother and Father are not limited to your biological Mother and Father.We all have the capacity to give each other the Blessing of the Father and the Blessing of the Mother. We are all Mothers and Fathers to each other. We can also be Mothers and Fathers to ourselves.

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A Co-Creative Initiative of the Center for Integral Wisdom and the Foundation for Conscious Evolution Activating the Memory of the Future

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Dr. Marc Gafni

Dr. Marc Gafni

Author, Visionary Philosopher, Evolutionary Mystic, Social Innovator, and the President of the Center for Integral Wisdom. http://www.marcgafni.com