The Start-up Dictionary for a Start-upper’s Girlfriend
This is not one of those posts attempting to explain all the new start-up vocabulary that are popping up as the start-up community grows globally. Ok maybe a little. Welcome to the world where unicorns are not mythical horses with a cone on their heads and angels are not hallowed beings who ‘art in heaven.’ Incubators are not machines used in scientific labs for cell culture, but have a totally different meaning in this evolving community. I’m sure those of you already immersed in this world would have had to face situations where you’re trying to explain the meaning of these words to people who have taken the normal career path, and are working their way up in big corporations.
Or you’re one of those trying to explain to your girlfriend in simple terms what it is exactly that you’re doing so she can tell all her darling girlfriends.
As someone who has just entered this world, I am indeed, also one of those girlfriends who are still learning about all this start-up mumbo jumbo so here is a list of words and what I thought they meant before and after my boyfriend’s attempts to explain them to me.
1. Unicorn
(u·ni·corn) ˈyo͞onəˌkôrn/
What I thought it meant: horses with sharp, cone-shaped horns that resemble a marshmallow swirl. Or Charlie.
What the boyfriend means: Like the mythical creatures you know, these are rare in the world and if you encounter one, you may have the feeling of wanting to own one yourself. These are start-up companies that are actually successful and have a value of over $1 billion. Only a few exist, and you may know some of them as Facebook, Uber, Instagram and Snapchat.
2. Ramen Profitable
(ra·men prof·it·a·ble) ˈrämən präfədəb(ə)l/
What I thought it meant: When your profit comes in the form of instant noodles or a tasty bowl of Japanese noodle soup. (Don’t judge me, I was hungry when my boyfriend was trying to explain this to me.)
What the boyfriend means: You read it right: Ramen, the infamous instant noodle that has saved many students’ lives, especially during exam period. A knight in shining armour that comes to the rescue during financially-difficult times, ramen in this context is no different and the term refers to when start-uppers are making just enough profit to get through each day.
3. Incubator
(in·cu·ba·tor) ˈiNGkyəˌbādər/
What I thought it meant: My Master’s degree thesis was on measuring some genetic changes in liver cells and I had to use an incubator so yes, that was what came to mind.
What the boyfriend means: An incubator in a laboratory provides an ideal environment for cells to grow, ready to be harvested for whatever testing scientists are working on. Basically, they’re there as the cells’ life support. Similarly to how incubators are used in a laboratory, the term in the start-up world refers to someone (or a company) who can support start-ups in order for them to grow.
4. Love Money
(love mon·ey) /ləv ˈmənē/
What I thought it meant: Something to do with women of the night. Boy, was I wrong.
What the boyfriend means: No, nothing to do with the exchange of money between ‘girls’ and despicable men looking for ‘love’ in the wee hours of the night. Love money is the money invested in your venture that comes from your loved ones such as family and friends, usually at the start-up’s first round of funding.
5. Angel [Investor]
(an·gel) ˈānjəl/
What I thought it meant: Messengers of god with big white wings who people look to to save the day.
What the boyfriend means: I would say I was fairly close to the real meaning with this one, as an angel investor is not so different from the ones in the bible, because they really do save a start-up from going down by putting in money in order for start-ups to survive. So in a sense they are the saviours of start-ups, hence the term angel. Boom.
This article does not even touch on all the new start-up vocabulary that are increasing by the hour, but hopefully it will benefit those who are trying to get a grasp on the start-up community. I, myself, am slowly learning different words every day and trying to get my head round my boyfriend’s world and his app, OhMyGeorge, that introduces one to FOREX trading through an easy-to-use game. Trading and finance is also something alien to me, but the app makes it slightly less so, and I soon became addicted to it like I was to Candy Crush. Someone please lock me up.