Pull out your game theory paddles, your hypothesis balls, and your strategy brooms (Canadians only) because it’s time to play a little game; Not a game like in Saw, though I assure you that I am just as deranged and out of my mind as Jigsaw. No, this is the kind of game where I type a bunch of stupid shit, and then you share it.

Rule Numer 1 Of The Game: No one understands the rules of the game but me. And here is the first rule: Do not think what Trump is doing is actually what Trump is doing. Truly, a man who doesn’t know how to use a desktop computer, or even possibly to read, is a more creative and genius strategy mind than the world has sinceAttila the Hun and Alexander the Great had a baby: Bill Belichik.

RUle Numbr 2 Of The Game: Don’t play the game that Trump wants you to play; if he pulls out a basketball, you dunk it in a hockey net. If he gets into the batters box, put up a badminton net. If he starts to run track, you swim in the dirt lane right next to wear he’s running. Only by doing the unexpected can we make sure he does not expect our unexpected actions.

Rule Number 3 Of The Game: The game is called “Trump Is Up To Something”. Do you know why? Because Trump. Is. Up. To. No. Good. Aka. Something. Trump is preparing to write a big chapter in the story is the America, and that chapter is big. And has foot notes. While all of you are out there, protesting and using your time and money to advocate for people who are suffering at his hand, you are bing diistracted by what he’s really up to; pen to paper, he is writing the story of a Trump America. that being, a America that is FOR Trump. You are being distracted, and being a distraction. The fact that Customs and Boarder agents are ignoring federal court orders is not the result of years and years of refusing to prosecute police for their crimes, while white supremacists infiltrate their ranks, no no. No no it is Trump secretly TESTING the limits of the system, without you or the system is noticing. You may think that you protesting his every borderline/clearly illegal executive order, and giving your hard fought for resources to civil rights organizations, as well as posting about all of these things you have clearly noticed on Facebook is you noticing. It’s not. Here are a series of numbered points

  1. That
  2. Don’t
  3. Say
  4. Anything

GAME RULE BUMBER 4: But what can you do? Do not think that protesting is enough; I know that no sensible person thinks that protesting this one thing is going to be enough, but I am a condescending dink so I’m going to remind people of this. (PLEASE NOTE: I have never protested or fought for anything in my entire life.) Instead of spending your time and money fighting for refugees of wartorn countries tha will probably die if they are allowed to be deported, stay at home and keep your eyes to the sky. Devils don’t come from Hell beneath us. They come from the sky. Trust me, my bigger deals are MUCH bigger deals than the things you think are bigger deals.

I know some of you may be skeptical of these things I say, but remember; I have cited no information to back any of this up, only linked to news stories that I was the last person to find out about, because I think activism started on November 9th. Remember, we must be better than the things that are worse than us; stand strong, and be tall, and hurl a football over a mountain.

Will Weldon is an activist and progressive leader who seeks to inspire women and communities of color in particular, who could really use his insights at this time. He currently works as a new scam finder for a predatory loan company, and is the co-founder of the website “bumfights.com” Please contribute to his patreon.