My Zero-Tolerance Policy for Online Bullying
Meanness is weakness, and hate is the wrong paradigm for the future of our species.
Because I recently changed my Facebook profile policy to a more open model of outreach, I am getting a lot more interaction with my personal Facebook posts than I have in the recent past. I am excited to be using Facebook in this way to meet more new people with whom I may share common ground.
In adopting this more liberal policy, I am meeting lots of folks of which I know little, and that’s what this is all about. “Hello, nice to meet you!”
Unfortunately, when mixing in these unknowns, I am finding a few people who, out of habit, or because of current cultural norms, think that it is ok to be insulting to either myself or to my friends whom are interacting with these posts.
It’s not.
I just need it to be known to everyone who interacts with me here or elsewhere on the internets, that I have a zero-tolerance policy towards online bullying. My practice is simple: If you want to argue or debate, I’m fine with that. Bring your facts, and try to leave the logical fallacies behind.
However, any time someone gets abusive, I’m done. That person’s post will be removed without comment, and I will block them from further interactions. And if they are threatening in any way, they’ll be reported.
I’m not interested in the drama, and I know that what these people really want is attention, so I don’t give them any. Don’t feed the trolls, as they say, or they’ll keep coming back for more.
And I’d just like to take a moment here to say how incredibly foolish it is to insult and intentionally alienate another person, especially an online stranger. You don’t know anything about what they are capable of, or who they know, or what kind of power they might have to be retributive.
Some people will become vindictive over very small things. Why would you want to invite that karmic negativity into your life? Far too many have gotten into violent fights or long-lasting feuds because somebody thought it was cute to get in a good zinger on Facebook. What a waste of time and energy.
It’s pretty simple. You get back what you put out there.
Everyone needs to understand that meanness is weakness. It takes a lot more personal strength and self-esteem to be nice and courteous to others, and the pay-offs in life are great when we treat people kindly.
And I’d like to say one more thing about this from a strictly personal angle:
I was bullied in school to the point where I dropped out of high school during my first year. To this day, I can still feel the patterns of fear in my mind and body that were created during that time. I’m still rewriting that programming, if you will.
It’s a kind of post-traumatic stress disorder, in that I can become physically ill just because someone is being mean. I didn’t talk about this during the majority of my life, because I thought to be on the receiving end of bullying meant that I was weak. But now I see that to hide it and not talk about it — that is what’s weak. To speak out against it and take a stand, that is as strong as it gets.
Hate is the wrong paradigm for the future of our species. And I ask you—if you agree with me—that you recommend this post or reshare it somewhere where others can read and learn.
© 2013 by Matteo Wyllyamz
