March Madness
Keeping Track
Keeping track of one’s progress, periodically looking back on it, helps reassess aspirations, goals and priorities in order to achieve them.
March has been kind of chaotic, to say the least. No need to go over the recent events but they can be used as a means to forgive oneself for missing a target.
Rest
Let me start at the top. My health has been my primary concern since the beginning of the year. Looking back on 2019 I had decided to take (even?) better care of both my body and mind.
You do know the adage: mens sana in corpore sano. From then on my motto.
Rest is the cornerstone of this endeavour and for the last couple of months I had finally been able to get my eight hours of sleep every night. Moreover, I was even sticking to a schedule. Rising around 5 am to set, like the sun, around 9 pm — more or less.
Unfortunately, this is the part that I am the least proud of: I broke the pattern and cannot seem to stick to the schedule anymore. I almost wanted to use the word disappointed but that would not be true. I am not disappointed in myself. Not anymore. Not ever again. I simply understand now that there are times when I am at my best and others when I am not. A lot must be factored in and taken into account. It is not always easy to manage. That’s all.
Morning routine
My ideal morning routine: waking up every single day (yes, weekends too) at 5am, meditating for an hour, then running and yoga. Unknowingly, I had also been mirroring this routine in the evening, doing some soft and relaxing yin yoga before sliding into meditation and eventually diving into a deep restful sleep.
I was on track, building the habits of a lifetime. Compared to my previous self, my commitment and discipline were unmatched. I was proud of myself and even more peaceful as a result. I still am — proud.
In terms of tracking, my meditation practice had been on point since mid January. I managed to meditate two hours a day, sometimes three. On rare occasions I would only carve one hour throughout the whole day to reflect upon myself. I might also have skipped an entire day, once a month, but who’s counting? Right, I am.
Well, then I have to confess that this week I have reached rock bottom then. I do not even want to check but for the first time in months I haven’t been willing to meditate for days. Merely three actually. Yes, I just checked.
I would like to say that I don’t know what happened but I actually do. Life. High then unmet expectations. Ensuing a completely human reaction: I dropped the ball.
It’s okay. Life is a cycle. Sometimes you ascend. Sometimes you descend. I thought my rise irrepressible. I was wrong. Forgive me but I can’t help but chuckle at my own candid naiveté.
What matters is that I am back on track, so to speak. It was merely a misstep. An event that I must acknowledge as a possibly recurring one, in which case I will simply start again and be perfectly fine.
Learning
I try to find time whenever I can to learn everyday. I have tried to schedule it for the past few months but it never works so I am going to take it easy for the next month. No pressure.
Still, I managed to create and maintain a daily habit of learning two new languages and improving a third. The fact that I can come back, day after day, grasping more notions and concepts with more ease feels me with such joy.
Interesting. I came to a realisation as I laid down the last words of the previous paragraph. Maybe the secret (for me) to continued learning and renewed motivation.
I must admit that some days I just did not want to even try. I felt tired. It was increasingly difficult. It still is. But I kept at it and it paid off. On those days, instead of spending as much time as I usually did on learning something new, I would simply spend a few minutes reviewing the basics or an easier lesson.
I find it a good pattern, this cycle of learning and reviewing as I get stuck.
Reading what I just wrote, I realise that it might be the way people normally acquire new skills… I must then add that I am quite a fast learner who can get easily excited by the process. Without being impatient, I want to blaze through all the steps to quench my insatiable thirst for knowledge.
I have thus been learning to pace myself. This allows me to come back the next day, refreshed and incredibly motivated. Definitely a win.
Conclusion
This month wasn’t as bad as I thought when I started writing this piece. I am grateful for the progress achieved and better acquainted with the hurdles to avoid. I will patiently and benevolently work on those, granting myself some time and space to grow at my own optimal pace despite my desire to reach my aim faster.
I do hope for a better outcome at the end of April but I would honestly settle for a good one. My priority for the next thirty days: get my morning routine back as it sets the tone for the whole day and even my quality of life.
Now, let’s keep up the good work until May.
The order in which I have exposed these topics is merely the chronological order of my days. I wake up (hopefully) rested, meditate, run, do yoga (ideally all before 8 am) and start my day energised, ready to learn and grow more. I meditate again before falling asleep and the circle is complete.
Thank you for taking the time to read my words. I feel lucky and I am grateful. May you also find the routine that gets you happily through life, allowing you to enjoy every moment.
Unconditionally, Léonie.
