Share What You Love
Increase the odds of making friends and engaging activities that bring you joy with this One Clear Step
Start 3 sentences today with the words, “I love…”
🐝 WHAT TO DO:
As you are in conversation with others today, start three sentences with the words, “I love…”, and complete the sentences by sharing something that is important to you, or that you are passionate about.
You don’t have to publicly sing a song about it, although you could.
It can just be something you share in the midst of an ordinary conversation with one other person.
Try it and notice what happens when you put your attention on what gives you joy, delight and happiness.
“I love . . . country music.”
“I love . . . gardening.”
“I love . . . dancing like a chicken under the light of a full moon.”
Take this step when you’re around people
⏰ WHEN TO DO IT:
The best time to take this Step is when you’re in conversation with another person or group. Talking about what we love can be a casual way of connecting, as in, “I love your sweater,” or a more vulnerable act of self-disclosure. “I love my children.” Use your discretion for what types of expression are best suited to your circumstance.
Try to take this Step every day for a week. If you’re not going to be around anyone in person, make a phone call.
Self-disclosure leads to fulfillment
🔑 WHY IT WORKS:
As Clifford N. Lazarus, Ph.D. explains in Psychology Today magazine . . .
To be loved for who and what you genuinely are (including your faults and limitations), instead of for some image you have created, is an important path toward personal and interpersonal fulfillment.
This excellent resource article on self-disclosure shows how…
The intensity and frequency with which we self-disclose personal details shape the types of relationships we have with people in our lives — our family, friends, coworkers, and other communities.
When we cover up the awareness of what we love, we are denying ourselves a rich source of inspiration and fuel for our growing journey. We’re also withholding authenticity in our relationships.
Make a list of what you love
👜 WHAT YOU’LL NEED:
It can be useful to make a list of things that you and review your passions, commitments and joys privately, before you’re in contact with others. For many of us, especially any of us with social anxiety, we can lose touch with the things that are most important to us when we’re feeling nervous and concerned about fitting in with a group or connecting with another person.
If you get in the habit of reviewing and even listing what you love it will be easier to express something having to do with this in a relational moment.
📌 QUOTABLE
“Being honest may not get you a lot of friends, but it will always get you the right ones.” — John Lennon
📙 ADDITIONAL RESOURCES
