A Mom’s Conversation with God
On prayer coming while standing in the frigid Atlantic surf
How a Mom and Wife Gets Ready for a Trip
Jesus, We leave in an hour. Almost done packing. Laundry is finally caught up. Kids clothes are ready, my clothes are packed, husbands are laid out on the bed for him to choose and pack when he gets home from work. Picked up the prescription and some sunblock at the pharmacy and ran all the errands in town before the long weekend begins.
Did I forget anything, Lord?
Made snacks for the car and packed food to take along, can’t eat out…my husband is finally beginning to feel better, but he needs to watch his diet, preserve him Lord!…so if I bring good things for him to eat, we won’t eat out that much. The older children will be staying behind for work. They have enough food left here for he weekend. Stopped at my parents, Lord watch over them! I noticed that his grass needs cutting…I better get on that as soon as we get back; need to cut ours too. Feed the fish, water the plants, empty the dishwasher one last time…I hope I didn’t forget anything. Lord, did I forget anything?
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner!
He’s home! I hope the bags will all fit into the trunk. I hope the kids have enough leg room. It’s a long ride. They’ll listen to their music on the way. It’s so loud. Can’t think. Can’t pray…
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner!
We arrive. Car is unpacked. It’s late and we’re all tired. We drop into bed and sleep soundly…except for me. I hope the kids at home are okay. I hope they remember to feed the fish. I think it might be raining outside. Did I close the windows? Oh Jesus, did I remember?
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner!
The sun is up. Coffee’s on! Getting dressed for the beach. It’s late May and the air is so warm, but I’ll bet the water will be cold. The kids don’t care! Here we go! I think I’ll go down to the edge and see.
As I step to the edge of the water, I hold my breath as a wave creeps slowly toward my feet. When it finally reaches me the icy cold suddenly brings my racing mind to a sharp state of coherence that hasn’t been held by me in a very long time and everything around me abruptly stops.
I realize that behind me there stands a boisterous throng of humanity, among whom are my family and dozens of other families assembled along the sand to enjoy the day. They are all too timid, or too intelligent, to stand where I stand now.
Prayer Comes!
I can not see or hear them; I only hear the roar of the waves.
At this moment, I stand alone, alert, and with icy feet, looking out at the vast, grey expanse whose only discernible feature is the line in the distance where the air and water meet.
Oh, Lord! It’s so big! I feel so small! I marvel that You are even more magnificent than this!
As I look out over the deep I notice that I am really not alone. I spy three dolphins! I love dolphins! They circle around in front of where I stand, slapping their tails and breaching to take in a breath of that crisp, salt air to refresh themselves before they plunge into the abyss once again. I take a deep breath. I’m doing that too. The sea is their home, dark and deep and yet they need to breathe to live there. They need the breath of the Spirit that scripture tells us “hangs over the waters” as all living creatures do. I need that too.
O Lord, thank you for the gift of those beautiful creatures!
My soul is quiet as I watch their antics. The perfect moment for prayer presents itself for me now and I wish to pray with all my heart, but the words, as usual lately, escape me…Lord, what do I say? My soul begins to chant…
Let us who mystically represent the Cherubim and sing the Thrice-Holy Hymn to the life-creating Trinity…
What is this? I hardly resemble a Cherub today, Lord. They sing praise to You before Your throne constantly, and today I have barely had time to toss you a few words here and there. You deserve so much more from me. I want to sing, Holy, Holy, Holy to You all day, as they do, but well, You know. Heaven and Earth are truly full of Your glory! So is the sea! It is magnificent here!
…Now set aside all Earthly cares, that we may welcome the King of All, invisibly escorted by angelic hosts! Alleluia, Alleluia, Alleluia!
Ah! I see! Thank You, Lord, for the gift of the icy cold water today. Thank you for allowing me to be shocked by the vast, cold, magnificence of the sea so that I could set aside the thoughts of my racing mind and welcome you back into my day, my heart, my soul where you should take first place. These Earthly cares do seem to swallow me some days. I need to breathe here where the water meets the air and refresh myself with You here before I go back out into the deep.
Thank You.
Amen.
