You’re Not Making A Mindful Anti-Technlogy Choice, You’re Making A Tradeoff in How You Approach Relationships

How many text messages do you send a day? How many times do you open snapchat in a week? Maybe a ton. Maybe you don’t even have a Snapchat.

But if you take a second to think about it, how amazing is it that Snapchat, FaceTime, or any of these things today even exist?

Technology has transformed how we, as humans, enagage in relationships with one another. It’s happened time and time again. The Telephone. The Internet. The Cellphone. The Smartphone. Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Facetime.

It’s hard to argue that engaging in a relationship with someone has never been more accessible.

On the opposite end, it’s also hard to argue that being focused on the present reality we sit in has never been more difficult.

And naturally, it’s easy to say that Smartphones in particular have lead that brigade.

From there, it’s also natural to say that our smartphones are making us more mindless.

And for many, the slide goes all the way down: smartphones are ruining relationships and lives today.

Are they?

I think it’s a fair question to ask, no?

Smartphones, after all, are said to be as addicting as some drugs.

Mindfulness Is A Conscience Choice

I’ve been reading Mastermind: How to Think Like Sherlock Holmes, which is a book about Mindfulness (that I DEFINITELY recommend).

And so in the context of this post, it would be easy to say that the best, & perhaps most the noble choice you could make to be more mindful today is to be very disciplined about how you use techology.

Sorry, I’m usually not near my phone haha.

But what Mastermind has taught me above all else is that mindfulness is very much like a muscle, and it’s a choice in whether or how you develop it.

The False Smartphone-Mindfulness Dichotomy

But here’s the point I opened this whole thing up with, and wanted to make clear:

By being selective in how you decide use technology, you’re not making a strictly mindful anti-technlogy choice, you’re making a tradeoff in how you’re going to approach relationships & life.

By the end of 2016, it’s estimated that nearly 2.1 BILLION people will have cell phones on earth.

You’re trying to tell me that being picky in when you decide to use your phone is going to make you mindful in all of your relationships and that it’s the noble & polite choice?

People can chose to use technology less with the intetion of trying to be more mindful. In fact, I try to do that too.

The specific bone I’m trying to pick here is with the subtle snobby sentiment that I’ve come across from different friends, family, and aqaintences that have subscribed to this personal policy of “mindful” choice to use technology less.

The reality of the world today is most people keep in touch over these platforms. Most people use text messages to make plans, Instagram to share moments, and Snapchat to do, well, everything in-between.

Again, I might be generalizing here, but I think my arguement still stands:

You’re going to miss out and damage relationships by adopting an anti-smartphone policy in your own life.

There’s CERTAINLY benefits in doing so.

But just know you’re not taking the high road, you’re making a personal choice with clear tradeoffs.

Mindful people are not the people who use technology less. They are the people who are more mindful.

The Reality of Communication & Technology Today

There is a real widespread smartphone addiction issue today that very few people are openly talking about.

I hate to beat the drum of the current posterchild of the day — but Pokemon Go is a really great example of that.

But even then, there were plenty of counter examples that have shown the social good the game provided. Maybe even more exaples than the vast number of examples of people acting like drones trying to catch em’ all.

But when everyone is using their smartphones to communicate, you’re choosing the weaken your ties with others when you become a “mindful” technology snob.

Obviously the opposite end of the spectrum is one you can see more prominently everday: drones, everywhere.

But that’s the point: how you decide to use, or not use, technology is a choice. That choice comes with consequences. Choosing between consequences is called a tradeoff.

And those consequences effect other people, whether you mean to or not.