Cerebral Civil War
Mind spinning like roulette, I am not able
To let my thoughts reset, and clear the table
Of all the pictures, and all the memories
I still feel your fingers, but have a tendency
To forget your poison, forget your infidelity
Cool air from the late fall, our favorite season
I’m playing football, and you’re in the stands screaming
This is more than just bliss, this is a whole new feeling
Jersey still on, we kiss, but my heart stops beating
The game is over, but I still think I’m competing
I felt like a king, but with no confidence
Unrequited feeling, that was my hypothesis,
Blaming myself by nature, questioning my competence
My own biggest hater, me, being the confluence,
Of all this negative energy, of all this nonsense
My self made infection, my own worst enemy
Talk myself out of affection, with extreme zealotry
Vendetta against myself, my final frontier
Deprive myself of relations,because they interfere
With my confrontation of perfection and fear