An Open Letter to Peanut Butter Charlatans

Your unholy faux Spread should land you in jail

Jean Campbell
May 11 · 5 min read

Dear Peanut Butter Thieves,

I sent my husband to the store, but he is not so cunning and crafty as I. He was duped by your cloak-and-dagger ways, your ruthless campaign of deception that began in the 1980s.