An Open Letter to People Who Write Instructions
I’m begging you to stop writing.
Dear Instruction Writers,
I know most of you are tri-lingual so I’m hoping this letter can be translated, maybe with pictures. I admire how many languages you can speak and kind of write but when it comes to explaining how to put together a piece of furniture or machinery, I don’t know why you were hired.
It’s not your fault, or at least that’s what I tell myself when I’m cursing your name as sweat drips from my brow onto your single sheet of black and white instructions. I’m sure you took the job because it sounded fun and maybe you wanted to help people. Or, more likely, you’re an engineer who dreams of becoming a novelist/sadist.
Whatever the case, I’m darn sure that words are overrated when it comes to explaining how to assemble anything.
How do I know?
Because last winter Article sent me a bed frame and it came late due to some horrific combo of holidays, all of which all landed on successive Wednesdays, so by the time it arrived my husband had skedaddled and I had to fly solo on the assembly.
They sent a labeled packet of nuts and bolts, 1 Allen wrench, and a pamphlet of instructions with only pictures. That’s right, there were zero words.
