Fly Humor
An Open Letter to That One Damn Fly Always Buzzing Around My Head
I hate flies
Dear Mr. or Ms. Fly,
You know who you are buzzing in my kitchen. Every day, you are killed but right after I toss your splattered and fractured body in the trash, another one of you appears. How do you do that? Is there a little line of flies waiting outside my kitchen? Kind of like tag team wrestling. Once one fly meets its demise, another fly tags in.
The issue is not just that you are in my kitchen but that you must bother me. I see you and I truly try to ignore you. If you stay away from me, I will stay away from you. But, no, you just can’t do that, can you?
You see me typing, quickly and intently on my laptop, and you buzz my head. I flap my arms wildly about my head and I think I see a little snicker on your smug little fly face.
You fly into another room and a sigh escapes my mouth in relief. But relief is short-lived. Just when I am intently focused on my work, you dive bomb my head and the arm flapping begins again. You suck.
I wait. I think to myself that you have moved on. We have other rooms in this house besides the kitchen. You CAN go somewhere else. You have wings, so you can go anywhere. But inevitably, you come back to bother…
