On The Road Again…
By perseverance the snail reached the ark.
— Charles Spurgeon
I’m tired. I’m tired of writing. I’m tired of being sleepy. I’m tired of not knowing what I’m in for the following day. I’m tired of processing. Simply put — I want to whine about how tired I feel. Because that’s all it is, really. Feelings! The good news is that I know they are fleeting. So I hold on to the truths I know and I press forward. Someday, I will have enough sleep. Someday, I will feel rested. Until that all changes again and I am tired again. There is a season for everything, isn’t there?
Going back to my last day in NOLA…
There was a gentle knock on the door. I could hear Kuzco’s nails scratching the hardwood floor just outside the room. Carly’s soft murmur and some energetic thumping on the floor told me Lydia was just outside the door. A huge smile illuminated my face. “Come in,” I exclaimed. Not very loudly since I hadn’t fully woken up but I loved the idea of seeing my girls.
The smell of fresh coffee with a touch of almond milk filled the air. For all the skeptics out there — yes, I could smell the almond milk too. :) Carly came in with a mug following Lydia who bounced on the bed immediately. Kuzco whimpered for a bit because he wanted to be on the bed as well but it took more effort for him to get there.
“OK, give it to Snezhi,” Carly said as Lydia was mesmerized by the object she was holding. “That’s what you do with a present. You give it away, Lydia!” Lydia didn’t seem to get the concept. Or she didn’t want to. I couldn’t tell which. I just kept smiling, the thought crossing my mind that I’ve got morning breath. Oh well!
Lydia’s attention was being held by a Christmas ornament from Starbucks with images from New Orleans. Hmm… I don’t like spelling New Orleans anymore. I feel like it sounds too Californian, if there is such a thing.
Lydia eventually gave me the present as Carly was explaining how she had gone to Starbucks and gotten me a coconut milk late but got confused and ended up drinking it instead of her drink. So she made me a fresh late with almond milk. The funny thing is — I prefer almond milk anyway. :) I love these little seeming mishaps. Also, Carly just makes my joy quotient go up.
The Christmas ornament is to remember her and NOLA and the coffee and fresh blueberries is to say “good morning.”
We hang out on the bed for a while and I keep my internal recorder going as I don’t know when I’ll see her again. Eggs and fresh salsa for breakfast. I love this girl!!
On the road an hour later than planned. Oh well! Also, 9 hours driving doesn’t seem like much of an issue these days. :) I do my duolingo, listen to TEDTalks and music and reflect on life. There is so much to do. So much!!
Got to Ocala in the evening. Immediately we started talking. Actually, I did a lot of (if not most of) the talking. Basically, testimony time! Carissa said she hadn’t heard much of what I shared with her and her family that night. I suppose, I couldn’t talk about it before. It was too painful. Of course, sharing about myself meant going into details and playing the ukulele. Being vulnerable is not difficult when one feels safe and I’m feeling safe these days.
A comment jumped out at me while we were talking. “Complete restoration includes not having fear.” I feel a sense of déjà vu. I need to process this further.
Nov 28
