Working Class Families
An editorial on the exclusion of families and mothers from the left.
Organizing spaces on the left struggle with being inclusive towards mothers and families. This likely stems from ingrained sexism and capitalist thinking that has bled into our activism, and the idea, conscious or otherwise, that we do not need to make accommodations for a large portion of the working class that is predominantly women. The forms of exclusion range from little things, like meeting times and locations, to larger issues like actively excluding mothers or certain groups of working class mothers from discussions on leftism, labor and feminism.
As leftists, it is our responsibility to work towards creating inclusive spaces for all members of the working class, and we must extend this to families and mothers. While not everything needs to be child friendly, and we shouldn’t need to go out of our way to make literally every single event child friendly and family friendly, we should be conscious at all times of the diversity of the working class and our responsibility to remain inclusive. Keep in mind that even if your organization is largely child-free individuals, that a very large portion of the working class is not, and that your membership might be skewed simply because the organization is not as accepting as it could be of the many different types of families in your greater community.
One form of exclusion I notice is exclusion and criticism of young mothers and “stay at home” mothers. This is problematic as it lacks understanding of how class affects these situations and disregards the labor involved in taking care of a child or children all day. By implicitly asserting that the only labor that “counts” is what one is paid a wage for, you are buying into a lot of shitty capitalist ideals.
There are many class-based, feminist reasons for being a young parent. A major one is access to family planning. Unfortunately in our society, family planning is a privilege, not a right. Preventing pregnancy can be difficult, even when you have been exposed to decent sex education, have health insurance and have the ability to get prescriptions and pick them up. Furthermore, access to abortion is incredibly limited for the poor, and that is before taking into account cultural pressures against having an abortion that disproportionately prey on the poor.
Another, perhaps more modern, reason is health insurance coverage. Many people lose their insurance at 26 years old and are not able to get on a new plan. The cost of pregnancy and childbirth — even a textbook, unmedicated vaginal birth outside of a hospital following a low risk pregnancy with complications (which is not something a parent always gets to plan for) — will cost thousands of dollars. Take into account hospital costs and a few complications or a c-section (the c-section rate in Florida is above 33%) and you are paying tens of thousands of dollars. It is not uncommon for the costs of an uninsured pregnancy to exceed $100,000. Additionally many providers will not see uninsured patients, and programs like Medicaid are complicated and limited, particularly in states that have not expanded Medicaid. It is a lot easier to have a baby if you have good insurance, so more and more, people are planning on having children before they lose insurance, because they know they could not afford to do it later.
There is also the whole “why the hell not” side of it. If someone wants to have a child before they are 30 and they are able to, why not? They should be able to do so without ridicule, especially from feminist groups. No one should feel like they have to justify their family planning decisions.
There are also many class-based reasons for being an older parent, and a lot of struggles inherent to that. It takes a long time to be able to afford to have a child, including being able to get good insurance to afford it, or to be able to pay for infertility treatments. That is just as valid, and having children at an older age isn’t some badge of honor, but another reflection of your circumstances.
Another issue I see often on the left and in labor organizing has to do with how we perceive labor that isn’t paid. In a socialist organization, you would expect for everyone to be valued regardless of whether or not they are paid a wage for their labor. Yet we fall into a bad habit of letting some of our capitalist upbringing influence how we think about people who are not paid for their labor, particularly when that labor is traditionally considered feminine. Raising children is important labor. As are cleaning, cooking and other tasks that stay at home parents do.
It’s worth pointing out that if you are cleaning someone else’s house or raising someone else’s children, you are paid to do so. A working class movement that ignores or belittles this labor when it is not being performed under capitalist employ is problematic.
There are many class-based reasons that might influence someone to “choose” to not work a traditional paid job and instead stay at home with their children. The pretax minimum wage income for someone in Florida working 40 hours a week is $330. Daycare can easily run $200 a week but many are closer to $300 depending on schedule, location and quality. Take into account transportation expenses (both to work and to daycare), the added cost of bottles and in some cases diapers (most daycares don’t allow cloth diapers which are a fraction of the cost of disposable, and are therefore a common choice for poorer families) or pumping supplies, and at best you are not making or losing any money. Another cost new working parents who have their children biologically face is the potential need for an entirely new work wardrobe, as body shapes and sizes can change drastically after birth. There are also not readily available daycares for parents who work less traditional schedules. While some parents have family nearby that they trust and who are able to watch their children free of charge, many do not. Over 40% of workers are not eligible for FMLA, which doesn’t even offer paid leave. Therefore if a new parent wants to spend time with their child after birth (and take time to recover from labor and delivery), they are often faced with losing their job. Being a stay at home parent is not a wealthy white thing for women who provide nothing to society. It is a grueling job that is valuable and is often left to women, even when they would prefer otherwise.
There is also nothing wrong with actively choosing to be a stay at home parent. Unless you are also paying a nanny, a maid, and a financial planner, you are doing a shit ton of valuable labor for your home and for society. Stay at home parents are a part of the working class and should be considered as such. Just because we don’t have unions and just because we get paid nothing instead of a small amount does not mean we are irrelevant.
As a poor stay at home mother, I do not see fighting for the recognition of families and mothers on the left as a selfish act. I am fighting against problematic behavior and fighting to make organizations on the left more inclusive. This particular issue is one I am quite familiar with. I do not want my organization and the left as a whole to improve simply because it will benefit me and my daughter. I want us to improve because it will benefit our entire movement and it will benefit all families, not just my own.
Our job is to support our comrades and the incredible value we all bring to the movement in so many different forms. Also, we can’t underestimate the value of having children raised in positive, socialist communities.
Some additional points and ideas that might help Orlando DSA (and other organizations) become more inclusive in this area:
Family-friendly does not mean avoiding words like “fuck.” It does mean taking into account basic safety hazards for children (if you’re not sure, google it or ask a parent!), the timing of the event/meeting (stuff that is super early or super late at night can be difficult, since kids are a lot more time consuming to get up in the morning or get into bed at night), and other little things like the availability of clean space to change a diaper, space and opportunities for children to play or entertain themselves, etc.
Incorporating childcare into meetings is easy! A box of age appropriate toys for the children attending, a comfortable space (like a big blanket on the floor), and one or two volunteers is all you need. This allows parents to participate in a meeting without having to worry about paying for and arranging childcare.
It is also easy to incorporate socialism and social justice into activities for children. Yay for supporting our comrades of all ages and yay for teaching kids socialism at a young age!
We can work on educating ourselves on issues that affect parents and children. Expanding Medicaid, free childcare, Medicare for All, increased funding for public schools, free lunch and breakfast for all students, better working conditions for educators, expanding SNAP and WIC, and community education are all issues that fall right in line with our political beliefs and will make a real, measurable difference for working class families.
These issues should not be viewed as “other people issues”, but our issues. Even those who are single and financially stable, at the moment, won’t necessarily be both of those things indefinitely, and we all benefit from having healthy and happy neighbors.
