Three songs from the musical “The Hotwife of Hyde Park” by Emma Morris & David Safran
“Song of Tessa Kosta”
I want a museum of my Broadway roles
With peacock-tail rugs, a red velvet swing.
In every room you’ll hear “Song of the Flame,”
And high entrance fees for whoever goes.
The galleries are elegantly furnished,
There’s leadlight and Tiffany glass,
Guided tours and gilded artifacts.
There are Victor Herbert’s vases
And postcards from Jerome Kern.
Ethel Merman’s ashes in a marble urn.
A dark-haired soprano beauty
I was considered rightly.
The gods were near in the 1890s,
By the Twenties, they outgrew me.
But there’s mink and marabou from Gerswhin.
And one little drink, and then I’m alluring.
The galleries are elegantly furnished,
There’s leadlight and Tiffany glass,
Guided tours and gilded artifacts.
There are Victor Herbert’s vases
And postcards from Jerome Kern.
Ethel Merman’s ashes in a marble urn.
My private collection of public dramas.
“The Hotwife of Hyde Park”
The skater-boys in the alley,
I hear them talking about good kush.
And they rent the air emphatically
While upstairs I am flush.
I have one man who’s mad at me
And another at my bush.
Nailed a sheet over my windows
So the neighbors wouldn’t see —
Propped up naked on the pillows,
All the things he’s doing to me.
I told my husband every detail,
And he laughed incredulously.
I draw a bath at sundown
And imagine both of my men
As I strip off my nightgown
And sink down to my quim.
Not enough water to drown,
But not enough to swim.
I’m the Hotwife of Hyde Park, love.
And I feel all skewered and sore.
And it’s much too much too much.
And more and more and more.
“Luck in Your Pursuits”
We tell you that these messages aren’t welcome
Yet our fingers are dancing when we send ’em.
We were impressed a bit by your credentials.
What’s more impressive is you are not essential.
Thank you for submitting your proposal.
We thank you, we thank you, but you’re awful.
Or you’re skilled and we’re selective.
It’s not personal, but you’re rejected.
There’s too much on our plate,
Our plate is always full.
We have to mention dishware
When we crush your little soul.
We’re passing on your work,
Some of which we viewed.
We wish you luck in your pursuits.
Apologies: you don’t fill a hole in our roster.
Which already holds a thousand pounds of pasta.
We receive so many submissions.
It’s not you, it’s not you — it’s our dishes!
There’s too much on our plate,
Our plate is always full.
We have to mention dishware
When we crush your little soul.
We’re passing on your work,
Some of which we viewed.
We wish you luck in your pursuits.
Emma Morris is a librarian at the Newberry Library in Chicago. In 2018 she was a recipient of the Gwendolyn Brooks Poetry Award in the 14th Annual Illinois Emerging Writers Competition for her poem ‘MS 57947,’ which was then published in Ninth Letter. Other poems have appeared in The Oleander Review and Occulum.
David Safran is a writer, singer, musician, freelance journalist and podcast producer. Safran has lent his music to many brands and organizations, from Adidas to Amnesty International, and has contributed work to outlets such as The Awl, Newcity Magazine and NBC.
In 2013 Emma and David began to write songs for The Hotwife of Hyde Park, a bawdy comedy horror musical about failure. The following year, they were recipients of an artist sponsorship/residency from High Concept Labs and were awarded a grant from The Cliff Dwellers Arts Foundation to further develop the play.