The Tinder Apocalypse Rages On.
Did you know that there’s a 3rd wave of dating apps coming? Were you aware that there were 2 previous waves?
For a quick minute, let’s put dating apps on a spectrum. On this spectrum, all the way to the right will be called “serious” and all the way to the left, “casual”. Now what determines a serious or casual dating app?
1st wave hits.
If we consider this the spectrum of online dating, it may be fair to say that the 1st wave of online dating that consisted of sites like match.com and eHarmony are as far-right as possible when taking into consideration the high subscription fees users pay on these search engine based sites. Also, with a user base mainly consisting of an older demographic, users of these sites were/are the most serious of daters on the market looking for longterm relationships or marriage (my uncle met his wife on match.com).
Times have changed.
As we became more and more mobile a 2nd wave of online dating was only natural to roll out. Solving issues with clunky outdated PC based dating sites, apps like Tinder and OKC launched the first user friendly apps for the mobile user and making it free for everyone was obviously a home run with the younger demographic.
But what was most extraordinary about the 2nd wave of online dating is the fact that these apps exponentially increased the size of the dating app pool worldwide. Especially giving Tinder praise, we now enjoy a dating app industry with over 50 million + monthly active users; an immense increase in in total world wide active users from the 1st wave.
Tinder fatigue.
If we consider the model of apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hater, Happn, and the 100’s of others (disregard the TinderPlus that only 1% of users subscribe to), the reality is that the quality of a user’s matches are typically very low leading to fizzled matches, strange or inappropriate messaging and dating app burnout. As a result, users consistently end up with a large amount of matches converting into little or no real life first dates after a sensory overload of laborious swiping through users. I used Tinder, Happn, Bumble and Dine for 2 weeks in LA and here’s what happened.)
The main driving force of this overall issue is that these apps are as far-left as possible on the dating app spectrum. Casual apps attract users with completely different intentions and expectations unrelated to meeting for a first date essentially decreasing the quality of a match for someone who is serious about meeting for a date.
“Hit it and quit it”, by Nancy Jo Sales in her Vanity Fair piece “Tinder and the Dawn of the “Dating Apocalypse”.
“On a steamy night at Satsko, everyone is Tindering. Or OkCupiding, or Happning, or Hinging. The tables are filled with young women and men drinking sake and beer and intermittently checking their phones and swiping. “Agh, look at this,” says Kelly, 26, who’s sitting at a table with friends, holding up a message she received from a guy on OkCupid. “I want to have you on all fours,” it says, going on to propose a graphic sexual scene. “I’ve never met this person,” says Kelly.
At a table in the front, six young women have met up for an after-work drink. They’re seniors from Boston College, all in New York for summer internships, ranging from work in a medical-research lab to a luxury department store. They’re attractive and fashionable, with bright eyes highlighted with dark eyeliner wings. None of them are in relationships, they say. I ask them how they’re finding New York dating.
“New York guys, from our experience, they’re not really looking for girlfriends,” says the blonde named Reese. “They’re just looking for hit-it-and-quit-it on Tinder.”
“People send really creepy shit on it,” says Jane, the serious one.
“They start out with ‘Send me nudes,’ ” says Reese. “Or they say something like ‘I’m looking for something quick within the next 10 or 20 minutes — are you available?’ ‘O.K., you’re a mile away, tell me your location.’ It’s straight efficiency.”
“I think that iPhones and dating apps have really changed the way that dating happens for our generation,” says Stephanie, the one with an arm full of bracelets.”
“Hookup” changed the image of dating apps.
Casual dating apps like Tinder have “hookup culture” scathed across there names and it’s hurting many of us make new connections.
An interview with a young girl named “Tiffanie” from this VICE article written by Jake Kivanc last year really highlights the expectations and intentions of a majority of users on casual apps:
Tiffanie, 20, Swim Coach
“VICE: Your bio says to “swipe left” if someone wants to hook-up. Why?
Tiffanie: Tinder hook-ups are not good in my opinion. That’s just my opinion. I think it’s selling yourself short.
What do you mean by that?
I don’t know. Like, you don’t know these people. That alone makes me skeptical of meeting up with somebody. Why would I want to bang them off the bat? It doesn’t make sense. It’s not safe either.
So, are you against all hook-ups or just quick, fast hook-ups? Like, would you go on a date with somebody and then maybe hook-up afterward?
For sure, but they’d have to introduce it as a date and I’d have to like them. If someone’s just in for sex, that’s not something I’m comfortable with. They can do that on their own time and I’m OK with it, I just don’t really want to [be involved] in that sort of thing.”
3rd wave dating apps solve 2nd wave issues.
The key to tackling this issue is creating a platform that attracts users who are serious about meeting someone in the form of a date without the indirectness of how a match should pursue meeting each other. It is in this type of environment where users are on the same page, meet for a first date.
As 3rd wave apps move in, we will witness a renaissance. Mobile dating app companies will move back towards the right of the online dating spectrum following old routes where services really strived to maintain the quality of users. 3rd wave dating apps definitely cater to the serious mobile dating app user with the main mission being to get users first dates as efficiently as possible. Users of all different demographics, including millennials, will be willing to pay for these services if they are producing meaningful dating experiences.
