Introverts Decoded: Unspoken Dilemma While In Love
Things they never tell anyone else.
Updated title of the article from “Introverts Decoded: Why am I still single?”
LOVE, love is a romantic yet a scary word for many introverts. For introverts, it is not easy to fall in love. Love takes away so many things from them, more importantly, solitude. In the first article of Introverts Decoded, we have seen how different they are from many others. We have seen they are loving and caring by heart.
Then, why are they still single? Why are they scared of falling in love? How could not everyone see their inner beauty?
Let’s see if we can find the answer.
We know, we all are carried in two different directions by our heart and mind. The problem with introverts is that their mind is much stronger than their heart. Though they have one loving and caring heart but always dominated by their ruthless mind. This is why they are different and this is why they are introverts.
A battle starts within them-self whenever they fall in love with someone. A never-ending battle until any one of it wins. The battle is between their heart and mind. The heart strives for its love and the mind strives for its priorities, both are already firm in their fields. If heart wins then the love, the one also becomes the priority and if mind wins the heart has to sacrifice the love. But why does this happen?
Introverts work in a strange way. The work they do, the time they spend is always organized by their priorities. This is why they never feel lonely, this is why they are always busy with something meaningful. Their loved ones always have the highest priority with all exceptions. But reaching to that level is really difficult for anyone. It seems rare that they approach someone so instantly though they can sense any person in the first interaction. They wait until they pass through all stages of their mind. Like- Is it lust? Is it obsession? or Is it just their thoughts? Once they are assured that they actually like the one their heart starts making moves. And this is where the problem begins.
Wanna See! How does it go inside? Let’s see the conversation between heart ❤ and mind of an introvert.
Heart ❤: Let’s plan something, so we can spend some time together. Let’s call her out.
Mind: Oh! Come on bro! She is not interested in you.
Heart❤: Yeah! But why would anyone be interested in me if I never show up?
Mind: Don’t you have anything to do? Get back to work.
Heart❤: But I like her.
Mind: I know! But aren’t we both happier together?
Heart❤: Yes! We are… but sometimes I need someone, the one.
Mind: But you already have so many. Do not open up yourself until you are sure.
And it goes on…
Somehow the heart ❤ succeeds in calling her out, the mind settles for a while.
Now if she says YES!, the mind will allow the heart ❤ to continue. And if she says NO!, then the end of the story before it begins. Next time mind will come up with thousands of reasons to not to try again.
Here is the difference between others and introverts. Others try several times while introverts’ heart ❤ can try only fewer times. They will choose to lose the one than to run behind him or her. Harsh but the truth!
The stronger my heart tries to make a move closer to the one, the harder my mind tries to control and even suppress my feelings.
My poor heart.
Whoever they are it is just because of the combination of their loving heart and commanding mind. The mind regulates priorities to the things and the people which helps them to focus on fewer but important stuff. This enables their loving heart to spread whatever it has among those very close to it.
The tragedy is, no-one will get to see their inner beauty unless he or she gets on their priority list. You need to show real interest in them, to know them. But, you would ask: how could anyone be interested in anyone without knowing anything about him or her? It is possible, it is possible because you already got intuitions from him or her, you just need to trust in those. Snap-judgments which tells you that he or she is not exactly same as everyone knows, he or she has something different hidden inside. Remember! They are very good at catching lies, observing people, so never try that way. Once you are able to open the locked doors of their heart, they are all yours.
“If you are ever lucky enough to find a weirdo, never let them go.” -Matthew Gray Gubler
It is not like, introverts do not fall in love but it is the fact that the one has to try harder. His or her love must be compelling enough to set their heart free from their mind, to get himself or herself on their priority list.
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About: Rohit Surwase,
Techy by Birth. Writer by Hobby. Observer by Nature. Unpredictable by Character. Android Developer (Google Certified) by Profession.
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Previous article of this series: Introverts Decoded
