Isn’t that reason enough?
Today is your birthday.
For a while now I was thinking what I was going to do for your birthday. But then I thought to myself, is there enough of a reason to do anything?
I pondered on this idea for a while. Thinking in my head how I would see the notification on Facebook and I would write “Happy Birthday, have a great day!” And that would be that.
I was not satisfied with just a Facebook post. I wanted to be old-fashioned and send a birthday card. And not just a cheap card either but a really nice card and one that was your favorite color. Then I thought to myself it there was enough reason to even send you a physical card?
We dated for 11 months, isn’t that reason enough?
I still care about you, isn’t that reason enough?
We shared countless days and nights together, isn’t that reason enough?
We were in love, isn’t that reason enough?
We had special moments that only we shared, isn’t that reason enough?
It’s your birthday, isn’t that reason enough?
These are the thoughts that ran through my head as I bought your card and was fully ready to address it to you and send it. Reminding myself that it might not actually get to you, but intsead to your mother, because I didn’t know your new apartment address so I figured I would just send it to your home. I would hope your mom would read it and call you and tell you how I sent a card and how sweet that is. On the other hand your mom might not tell you in order to protect you and you might never know that I sent you a card.
The thought of you never getting my card killed my inside. But I figured I would at least try.
As it slid down the mail box into that dark abyss I thought that maybe there was hope for this to reach you and for you to think, “huh this guy still really cares enough that he sent me a card.” I find solace in the fact that if you get the card maybe just for a brief moment you’ll look back and think of me and remember what we had.
Inside the card I wrote a short note to you wishing you well in school and with your new apartment. I also wrote that it would be great to catch up sometime. I’m not sure if I wrote that because I was desperate to see you at some point or just as a friendly thing to say. It might have been a bit of both.
I hope my card finds its way to you. But alas I may never get a response. I might never get that text or call asking to grab a coffee and catch up. I might never get to see you and look you in the eyes again. I might never get the chance to hold your hand. I might never get the chance to call you mine again. But there is always that small chance that I might be able to. Only time will tell.
Happy Birthday.
I love you.
