Played Myself

“Played Myself”

I wish I could inspire you to love me with a verse

If I could, I would write until my hand hurts

Or mind breaks

Thoughts of us would fix it

I tell myself not to waste time wishing you felt different

My heart feels different

I keep wishing

I remember us kissing

I know I felt something different

Than you proclaim

I know we made love

I know it won’t just sex

I know you wanted us to move to the next

Level

I was convinced by devils

That we wouldn’t be special

Now I’m paying for it with your rejection

And if it’s true you never felt for me

I wonder what did I see

I wonder how I could have been so blinded

I wish it was just timing

Cause I could wait

But I guess I played myself

Cause I don’t know why I could think

You’d feel for me

Or why I think you feel for me

Or why I wouldn’t just keep my damn mouth shut

Or why I allowed myself to want us

Or why I believed it would happen

Or why I hope your mind changes

Or why I tore down my pride to tell you

Or why it hurts like hell

I guess its cause…I played myself

(That’s what I got for thinking)