The Mistake of Goodbye

The emptiness of missing you,
The pain sucking out my soul,
from the crater you have left.
For, I know that I was blessed.

Why does it haunt me so,
that I need you?
I cannot escape the hope.
Oh, I have been such a dope.

I imagined I could pretend.
That I could forget,
and just stop the feeling.
The longing that leaves me reeling.

Why do you fill my daydreams,
my waking moments of happy thought?
Why can’t I move on,
to the world where I’d withdrawn?

I hated the fear I felt with you,
the panic at my own emotions.
Yet, now I’m drowning,
in a lake of my own making.

I wish I didn’t need you so.
That you didn’t fill my soul,
and seem like the only light,
I can see in sight.

I never wanted to fall.
I never sought to care.
So, why did I need to find you?
For, I no longer know what’s true.

The gaping hole in me,
that you filled with possibilities,
now echoes in abandoned pain,
at a happiness I can never attain.