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The Sweet Seduction of Emotional Unavailability
How we long for that which we cannot have.
The thing about being tied to the emotionally unavailable is that this person can be sitting right next to you and still feel miles away.
It’s a strange sensation, really.
You miss the person most when they’re close, because you know it’s only a matter of time before you get locked out. You can sense it — sense the fact that they’ll be pulling away from you shortly. And no matter how hard you try, you’ll always be unable to reach them once they change the locks.
If you’re in a relationship with someone who’s unavailable on an emotional level, you’ll feel as though you can’t talk deeply about your relationship, what you want/need, and where you’re going. It’s like they’re always keeping you at arm’s length, and you’re constantly fighting tooth and nail to get closer.
They will either pull away, become angry, or change the topic altogether — anything to divert from the fact that they cannot meet you on that same field.
I’ve dated a lot of emotionally unavailable men. But that just means that I was emotionally unavailable, too. Because when you’re with someone who can’t be vulnerable with you, you’re also unable to be vulnerable with them. At least not in any…
