Power of Choosing

Personal Lessons from Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*** — Chapter 5: You Are Always Choosing

We can say that we choose all the time: consciously and unconsciously. I choose to write this article is an example of conscious choosing. The way I naturally feel when it’s raining (i.e. I hate it) could be a good example of unconscious choosing. It’s like you can choose everything: to believe, feel, react, respond, etc.

Your choosing shall affect you in some way.

If I choose to step up and take responsibility (like doing tasks that are critical but most coworkers don’t do it), I feel empowered. My choosing leads me to happiness and power. If I choose to respond to a rainy day by being playful no matter what, my day will be awesome.

On the contrary, if I choose to blame my coworkers for the delay they cause me because they don’t do their stuff, I become powerless, a victim. It might feel great at first, but it makes me a lesser person. I become rotten inside.

“When we feel that we’re choosing our problems, we feel empowered. When we feel that our problems are being forced upon us against our will, we feel victimized and miserable.” by Mark Manson

We also choose values and metric against which we measure ourselves. If my metric is to beat my coworkers at work in performance, I might become competitive and uncooperative, and workplace becomes toxic. If my metric is to raise the bar of the whole team, I become a team player who aims to create a positive, and uplifting work environment.

Being mindful of your choosing is being proactive according to the first habit in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, another book that I love.

So, yea. The lesson from this chapter would be be mindful and check your choosing in your daily life. It would make a difference, especially in the state of mind.

P.S. Thank you Mark Manson for a good book :). Link to the book is here.