10 years to get here, why so long?

I’ve been asking this for a while now…

It took me 10 years to get here, not in position but metaphorically and tonight I realised something. I had an opportunity to be this me about 4 maybe 5 years ago but I just didn’t know how, or I didn’t have the confidence.

A friend and work colleague at the time asked me why I didn’t lead, and I think I said something like I didn’t have ‘formal authority’ to lead (so it wasn’t my place). What I didn’t realise is I did have the beginnings of what I know now to be ‘social authority’….

something given and invested in me by those around me…

Sadly I couldn’t grasp this opportunity, I didn’t notice it, or didn’t know what it was, so inevitably missed it, I wasted the chance to be more me….and for the next 4 years I’ve kinda been lost or more accurately stuck in limbo.

Probably being divisive with it and for some of the time a problem child of the organisation poking and prodding to try and evoke change, promote conversation and make things happen. Again probably not my best move as much of this I also now know was set to ‘my agenda’ and not the agenda of the community within which I sat.

I’m older now, which means I get it (I think) and I get it wrong less often, which means I get it right more times than before.

Now with a deep interest in social good, social capital and its foundations based in social trust and community investment I share where my thought have come from and gone to.

So I started by asking:

1. could I have got here sooner (or is this how long it takes)
2. Who could have helped me (did they and I didn’t notice)
3. Who should have helped me (and why didn’t they)

Now I have shifted my perspective to how can I help others – effectively ‘what am I doing to help the person next to me’. This is a more valuable investment of time than concerning myself to much with – could I have gotten here quicker….

If I can help others cope better with the challenges of getting here then I’m doing a good job…

In closing I ask you to ask yourself….

What are you doing to help the person next to you

and act on your thoughts…offer support even if you don’t quite know what that is.

In getting these words down I would to thank Jane Booth (‪@opus29jane) for asking me to be part of her PhD research even if we haven’t spoken yet you have got me thinking and to Julian Stodd for finding a language I could understand in explaining what Social Leadership is all about…time to work on my craft.