How Helping Others Can Help You Too

Kevin Nokia
6 min readOct 15, 2023

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Photo by Ovinuchi Ejiohuo on Unsplash

The scavenger

I remember when I gave a scavenger a food in front of my boarding house.

He was working and trying to find something in the trash bin. I was walking towards my boarding house after buying some food that I really wanted. It’s like a reward for myself, and the reward is the food that I bought.

At first, I wanted to give him my food, but then I realized it was unnecessary because he may have eaten before.

I mean, kindness is good, but you don’t have to really do it if you don’t want to. You can still decide what you want to do with your food. So I walk past him. Suddenly, when I was about to go to the stairs, I stopped walking. I thought again and said,

“You know what? I’m going to give him my food. I know that I’m hungry and want to eat this, but I think he needs it more than I do.”

I thought, too, that I wanted to practice kindness toward other people. Even if it is small, at least I can start the habit of giving. At the end, I gave it to him, even though I was pretty shy about it because I felt new to this thing. It doesn’t mean that I haven’t given anything to anyone before.

It’s just that this is really weird because, at first, I was going to pass him without giving him my food.

So, yeah, it was a joyful experience.

Photo by christopher lemercier on Unsplash

The feedback

After a while, I had some problems in college.

I struggle with money to buy food and problems in my class. After a couple of days, I got help from my grandma to buy some food, and the problem that I have in class suddenly feels pretty light. I don’t feel any pressure to deal with it again.

That’s how I remember it.

So, the interesting part about this story is that, mostly, when you give something to people with kindness and no feedback intended, you will get help from God for your problem.

When I help other people, even if it’s only one dollar that they need, in the future I will get help in different feedback and situations, but the help will come at the right time.

Where I really need that help.

Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

The more you give, the more you receive

That is the most important thing about giving.

You might think that giving is pretty much lowering your money or your belongings, but it’s not. It’s otherwise. It seems like it, but it’s not.

You can see that a lot of people are giving away free knowledge through e-books or podcasts. It’s because the principle of giving is that you receive more than you give. So, don’t be afraid to give someone some help. Maybe they don’t repay you, but it’s okay.

When people don’t repay you as they agreed before, that means you will get more than what the agreement was worth.

Photo by Thomas Griesbeck on Unsplash

The more you take, the less you have

The principle works otherwise.

If you take more from people, you have less in your life. Sometimes it’s not only money that matters. Sometimes, happiness can be taken from someone else too. The principle always strikes at the right target.

It doesn’t strike at what you have abundantly.

It strikes at your weaknesses.

When you are trying to become happy but you keep stealing money from other people, you might have a lot of money by now. However, you might not feel happy. You might feel guilty or wrong because of what you do.

It sometimes strikes at what you are weak at.

So, avoid taking from other people or becoming egoistic to achieve all things.

Photo by Andrew Moca on Unsplash

Stop giving with the intention of receiving more

The principle won’t work if you think that you will get twice even more.

If you think that you will receive more or twice the amount that you give, that means that inside your heart, you are not willing to give. Giving is from the heart; no feedback is intended, and God knows it.

If you think that giving is about receiving more, you might get no feedback.

You might just give something to someone else without really receiving what you intended.

Photo by John Schnobrich on Unsplash

Giving is a skill

Giving is an act of kindness.

Kindness leads to a happy life because if you make other people happy, you will become happy. It’s not just about giving some money. It works too on happiness, knowledge, wisdom, etc.

You can see from the Feynman technique that you need to explain it to other people in the most simple way possible.

Why is that? It’s because if you can explain it to other people and they understand what you explain, that means you understand the material.

Other than that, you are giving your knowledge to other people, and the principle is that you will receive more than what you give.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash

You get more knowledge from sharing your knowledge

So, don’t just grind yourself to build your skills or life.

Give yourself time to help other people, even if it’s just a little bit. The more you give, the more you will give easily in the future. It might seem hard at first, but in the meantime, it will be much easier to give.

Remember that you are not alone in this world.

You have me, your family, your friends, other people who are reading this, and especially God.

“One person gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed.”

–Proverbs 11:24–25

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Kevin Nokia

Building reading and writing habits to eliminate doom-scrolling with I Am Literate https://substack.com/@kevinnokiawriting