My father — a man Iike no other

Jehan Ara
3 min readJan 17, 2017

It is 3 years today since he breathed his last and I still can’t come to terms with the fact that he is no longer here. My father was an amazing man. His sense of integrity and loyalty knew no bounds. A gentleman banker and a wonderful human being, he was a simple man who never aspired for material things. In that he and my mother were very similar. They were content with whatever they had at different times of their lives — a simple meal, a comfortable home, loving family and friends.

I remember as a child I learnt very early the values that my father stood for. He was walking me down the slope to catch the school bus one day when a car passed us. It was a fancy car with school kids in it. I looked at my father and asked with the innocence of a small child “Abbaji are we poor?” He knelt beside me on the pavement and asked why I had asked that question. I pointed to the car and said “We don’t have a car like that. We walk to the bus stop every day to catch the bus and we have to make sure we are on time otherwise the driver will leave us behind.” He smiled, took a deep breath and asked me some simple questions:

Do you have a comfortable place to sleep?

Does your mother give you enough to eat?

Do you have clothes and shoes to wear?

Do you have family and friends?

Are you happy?

I answered yes to all those questions. “Then my child,” he said “you are a very rich girl. You have everything you need. What would you do with more?” And then he added “Remember there will always be people who have much more than you do. Don’t look at them. Look at those who don’t have the basic things you do. Then you will feel very fortunate.” He finished his advice with this quote from someone famous “No matter how much money you have, you can only sleep in one bed at a time and eat three meals a day. Everything else is extra.”

That was an invaluable lesson — and just one of many that I learnt throughout my childhood. Most of them were learnt by just watching my parents live their lives — they were always respectful of people, always loving , caring and helpful, compassionate, sincere, content with what they had, completely honest in their dealings and in their relationships with everyone they came across.

As my siblings and I embarked on our journey as adults and contributors to society, we have tried to make sure that we continue to live by the same values and principles. I think my parents were proud of us not because of what we have achieved but because of who we are. And who we are is what they brought us up to be.

Today I miss my father desperately. I woke up early as usual this morning (a habit he instilled is us) and started my day by taking flowers to his grave (and to Ammi’s) and saying a prayer for them. All day I have felt an emptiness and a sadness that Abbaji is no longer with us although I know that in spirit he always will be. We love you Abbaji and we always will. Rest in Peace.

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Jehan Ara

Passionate, driven workaholic who is a gadget freak and is an evangelist for Tech Entrepreneurship and Startups in Pakistan. A communicator by profession.