Does Criticism really improve people?
I am currently reading the book How to Win Friends and Influence People and just in the first chapter, I had a life changing perception towards “criticism”. I’m a big believer in Steve Jobs and one of the things Steve Jobs is known for is his hurtful criticism towards people(although hurtful, I’m sure that intention was good). And it seemed to work, looking from the outside-in. Apple is one of the most successful company on the face of Earth right now. But does criticizing people really improve people?
But here’s the thing, a lot of successful Entrepreneurs believe in criticizing people, ask Jon Taffer
Abraham Lincoln on Criticism
At the start of his career as a lawyer, he would criticize his opponent by sending them angry letters or confront them personally. Until one day he insulted a very important man. That man challenge Lincoln to a fight to death. It was lucky that before the fight started someone came in to stop it. That day Lincoln learned that criticizing people does nothing, sure it will hurt them but the actions they condemn for will still remain unchanged. From that day on, Abraham Lincoln tried his best to never criticize anyone again. He learned to become more understanding. When he felt angry at someone, he tried to see through that person’s percepective instead of lashing out and doing no good to anybody. He is recorded into the history book as ‘one of the best ruler mankind has ever seen’.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain — and most fools do. But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.
I personally don’t think that criticism is all bad. I think it has a lot of uses, but the frequency it is being used today is unbelievable. I think we made criticism a habit, I think we search for bad things in people in order to criticize them, I think we’ve become the father in Father Forgets.
Make criticizing someone a rare occasion, and if you are going to criticize someone, remember this
He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help. — Abraham Lincoln