Pain Prayer

Soothing music in my ears, no matter how loud, cannot drown out the screaming ache from the parts that are meant to hold me together. Am I finally coming undone? If someone were to dismantle me it would be delightful. Carefully dislodge the parts that fight me from those that work. Let me look closely, microscopically, at these troubled parts until the trouble is revealed.

My clear seeing will drain the power from the pain. With compassion and forgiveness, I will honor the source of the trouble. “Oh, these poor, troubled parts,” I will say. I will fix all I can and dispose of the rest. I won’t grieve for the dispossessed parts; their release will be my rebirth.

Whatever parts are left will carry me wherever I need to go. I will find the love I need. The peace will be such that light will radiate all about me. My unburdened spirit will float in the air like an escaped ballon. All who care for me will look upon the sight and know: the time of travail has ended, she’s going to be okay now. She’s free.