Yet Another Article About Rape Culture

of reading about rape culture? Imagine writing one. Or even imagine being the victim of it. Oh wait, that you don’t have to.

So when I was tasked with writing about yet another article about rape culture, I was stumped. I mean I know my audience (Hi, Audience!) and they are well-read and/or my friends. So in the ocean of well-written, well-argued and well, amazing articles, what can I say new? And the truth is nothing. So obviously, there is only one solution: I need an audience update.

So right now I need you to do something: grab your younger sibling, distant cousin, that kid who always cycles in front of your house, that random child buying Poppins (#notanad) and give them this. Tell them to read from the next para?

Well, hello new audience! Always happy to have some new eyeballs for an article. You must obviously be wondering what made that older person take someone else’s mobile and show something to you. Well, the reason is, nobody likes to share their phone, it’s not because there’s always something incriminating on it but, it’s always better to be safe than sorry. It’s probably not even that incriminating, it’s probably just bad pics or something. My editor is telling me that might not be your only doubt and as usual, she is right.

The reason I wrote this article is because as I was searching about the controversial judgments related to sexual assault, I realised there is only so much one can do about the generation that is older than us. To make lasting changes, the world rarely needs really old and wise people making judgements from another era. But what we really need is young people, the ones set to take charge, to tell them, well, to talk to them, at least to discuss with them what Rape Culture is.

(And to those who have not shared the article because you can’t find them now: use this as starting points, then engage)

So what is rape culture? It is basically a culture that normalizes, if not encourages, rape, which is something we all can unanimously agree is bad. So why do people still say we have rape culture? It’s because rape culture, though the very name suggests otherwise, is not just about rape. It’s about how we talk about sexual assault or harassment. It’s about how we deal with situations that involves sexual misconduct. It’s about how we react to rape. If anyone thinks that you are too young to know about this, tell them if there is a chance that you might be a victim and that you deserve to know.

Now I can’t talk about every aspect of rape culture and its ramifications in this article, so instead I put together a very basic 15+1+1 points to help you not be a part of rape culture. Some of them may seem obvious, but remember that a Bombay HC did just say that without skin-to-skin contact, it cannot be sexual assault, so you know, there are people who need it.

1. Use big words. Use words like rape, assault, harassment. If they tell you you are too young to say these words, tell them the only thing you’re too young for is prison, because you get sent to juvenile prison (if you are under 16).
2. Don’t let anyone touch you anywhere that makes you uncomfortable.
3. Don’t touch anyone anywhere that makes them uncomfortable.
4. Nobody “deserves” to be raped. There are no bad people who get raped or good people who get raped. There’s only people get raped and rape is never justice.
5. Anybody can get raped, anywhere, anytime.
6. Rape is never the victim’s fault. It’s not about where they where, what they wear, how they walk, what their gender is, what their sexuality is. It’s only the rapist who is and should be at fault.
7. There is no “worse” type of rape, whatever the degree of physical or sexual violence, rape is bad.
8. Being interested in sex is not bad.
9. Sex is not a bad thing. It’s only natural. Your parents did it, your grandparents did it and there is a possibility that both sets are still doing it.
10. If you want to know about sex, ask the person who handed this to you (and if you wanna know, just shoot me a message).
11. Do only the things you are excited to do and with a concern for the people around you.
12. Don’t ever force anyone to do something that makes them uncomfortable.
13. No is a full sentence and it means NO. Other substitutes are I’m not sure, I don’t know if I want to, stop, I don’t feel like it now.
14. Pain, sadness, trauma are not simple things. How you deal with them is different than how others do. Nobody is wrong.
15. Being a victim of any type of sexual abuse is hard. So when they say that they were a victim even if every fibre of your being says otherwise, believe the victim, at least let them speak. And never, ever shame them.

Bonus

• Sexual assault is not just rape. Whatever makes you feel uncomfortable in your body is probably sexual assault. You know better than anyone else if something is sexual harassment. Don’t let them define what you felt.

Bonus bonus

• Any kind of sexual misconduct is about power. It’s to prove that the person who is the perpetrator, is always in control. So it is never the victim’s fault.

So yeah! That’s the end of list for you. I hope you found something new, something that helps you or something that lit the fire inside you. If any of these seem confusing to you, google it, search for it, read about it, watch videos, look for essays, just find out more about it.

And now give the phone back.

Welcome back old audience! You have some very important work to do. I’ve stirred the pot, now it’s up to you. Teach that young one about rape culture. Tell them what being complacent is. Discuss with them how to move away from this cycle, learn from them how to actively and passively fight it.

Most importantly, always keep fighting the good fight!

Stay strong. Stay aware.

Be understanding. Be supporting.

Let us make this world a better place for everyone!

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