The island: Chapter 2 — the secret
The man had discovered that he pooped, quite by accident, when he was young. First, his stomach hurt. It had started innocently enough with him sitting by his favorite ordinary tree, watching the waves. Then the strange sensation of something attempting to escape from his body. The more he held it in the more uncomfortable he became. At first he was fine. The next day was a little more uncomfortable. The next more so. By the fifth day he and the beast battled until it expelled itself from his rear.
But he was victorious! All that remained was stinky black tar.
This battle went on at least every other day. It no longer was as dramatic as that first time, but it continued to stink and was a process he generally found disgusting. Which, of course, meant he did not want the woman to learn about it.
What if she found it disgusting?
Trouble began when he would sneak off by himself. Them being the only two people on the island made it hard for him to sneak off. He’d feel the familiar foe grumbling in his stomach and get up and start going for a walk. When he got back she’d lazily look over at him and ask “Where you been?”
Instantly his ears got hot.
“Nowhere. Doing nothing.”
“You weren’t nowhere. That’s impossible.”
“Impossible? How do you know it’s impossible? I don’t even know where you came from.”
“Where I came from? We’re not talking about that right now. We’re talking about where you were.”
“I wasn’t anywhere.”
“Fine,” she said and turned her back.
Geesh, the man thought. Glad that is over. “I’m going to go look for some coconuts.” And he walked off, glad to have dodged a bullet. Boy, was he wrong.