THE FIRST CHIMPANZEE PRESIDENT


Last week, March 7th, was the 50th anniversary of the Selma to Montgomery march. Hundreds of African-American citizens, tired of the lack of voting rights and segregation, joined MLK in a historic march from Selma to Alabama’s state capital, Montgomery. The march paralleled the fight for equality: MLK’s path was long and arduous and was interrupted by Alabama state troopers, who rushed onto the scene and violently beat the crowd back. The entire world watched in horror as uniformed, white police officers unleashed gas into throngs of unarmed black men and women; a peaceful protest shattered by officers wading into the crowd, viciously attacking people with batons. It’s been 50 years, and somehow, for some strange and unknown reason… this is STILL happening.

50 years ago
Today

Since the shooting death of Michael Brown on August 9, 2014, people have continually denied that the shooting was fueled by racism. However, racism in policing is still a massive issue, especially in Ferguson, and something needs to change.

Recent emails sent throughout the various branches of the Ferguson municipal and judicial governments highlight an undeniable issue with today’s law enforcement. Emails circulated portraying President Obama as a “chimpanzee,” but even more amusingly a group of dancing, naked hooligans in Africa, obviously being “Michelle Obama’s high school reunion.” Thankfully, the Ferguson police force is equally discriminatory. Latinos who “can’t speak English” and are “unemployed, lazy,” are compared to dogs being put on welfare.

With this knowledge, is the Ferguson police department systematically singling out African-Americans and discriminating against them?

85% of people stopped by the Ferguson police just were coincidentally black. 90% of people who received citations from cops also just were coincidentally black. 88% of cases which involved the use of force were against; you guessed it, black people.

On top of the crystal clear numbers, Ferguson’s police department routinely uses excessive non-lethal force against black suspects. In 2013, after frisking and knowing for a fact that the subject in question (who of course, was black) was UNARMED, Ferguson police released dogs on the suspect because “he might’ve been armed.” Obviously, since he was black, he was going to brutally murder the police officer in question.

In 2012, an officer pulled over a black driver due to tinted windows which apparently violated the city code (they were probably too dark, just like the suspect). The officer then proceeded to charge the driver of the vehicle for 8 offenses: including telling the officer his nickname, not his real name (for the record, telling a cop that the boyz on the streetz call ya T-Dog probably won’t fly). Obviously, T-Dog here was a pedophile, so the officer proceeded to not only comment on T-Dog’s sexual inclinations for little boys, but then held a gun to his head and unlawfully searched his vehicle and arrested him.

Nothing good has ever happened to anyone named “T-Dog”

So the answer is YES, Ferguson police clearly and routinely discriminate and stereotype black people (most often males), demonstrated not only by these stats but the emails and behavior we have seen. Now two major questions arise:

Chiefly: why in the face of OVERWHELMING evidence that the Ferguson Police Department is a racist, worthless organization that completely perverts justice, are they allowed to continue to discriminate and it’s cops continue to act with impunity?

You tell me. The Department of Justice thoroughly shafted the Ferguson police department for their racism, but the people who forwarded racist emails are yet to be disciplined and better yet, racism is yet to be acknowledged as a factor in Michael Brown’s death. However, there is hope. Kinda. Talk has been initiated of actually dismantling the Ferguson police department.

Why are black people (usually males) targeted by police?

And the answer to this question is more multifaceted than before. It is easy to simply point at the police officers and scream: “Police brutality!!!” but in actuality, black teens also have to share some responsibility. There are numerous black people out there who perpetuate stereotypes by listening to ghetto rap, by dressing, acting, and talking a certain way. By fulfilling stereotypes, discrimination is only encouraged, so pull your pants up, stop making gang signs, and stop giving reasons for police to racially profile you. On that same note, if you look like you just smoked more weed than Cheech, Chong, 2Chainz, and Snoop Dogg combined, there’s a pistol sticking out of your pant pocket, you’re going 40 miles over the speed limit all while blasting “F da pOlice”, don’t be surprised when a cop pulls you over. For everyone looking for a way to make sure they avoiding public beatings by the police, all you have to do is OBEY THE LAW… and by obey, fringing on the line of taunting the police is not inclusive.

Pull up ur pants for Christ’s sake

On the other hand, cops need to realize that racial profiling is simply unacceptable. The critical issue at hand with police are two things: 1) Racist and pretentious scums that don’t seem to quite understand what “unarmed” means and 2) the militarization of the police. Thankfully, the first one is solved easily: dismantle and fix the Ferguson police department. Every police officer who clearly racially profiles doesn’t deserve a uniform. Secondly, police are obtaining weapons that they don’t need. For example, Keene Police Department of New Hampshire possesses a $300 000 Ballistic Engineered Armored Response Counter Attack Truck, or a BearCat, just in case there is a Taliban ambush at their annual Pumpkin Festival. By giving police the ability and training them to be excessively forceful, we encourage them to use force when it is unnecessary. We train them to view criminals as soldiers, and the streets as a Battlefield Hardline IRL. Unnecessary police toys need to be taken away.

Obviously this one black lady is gonna fuck those SWAT bitches up, that’s why there are 8 visible cops, one of whom is pointing his weapon DIRECTLY AT THE BLACK LADY WHO HAS HER HANDS UP

Discrimination in policing is a complex issue, it requires both critical faults to understand their faults and fix them. Moreover, it requires society to stand up and say “discrimination against minorities is never acceptable, and we will fight the power until we get fair and legitimate policing.” And don’t forget to add a little brotherly encouragement to our homeboy T-Dog. You sir have so much potential and the path that you’re on will unfortunately end with you crying after you get gang-raped in prison. You can thank Ferguson police for that one hell of a brutal end.

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