5 Ways To Deal With Stress As A Full-Time Dad (or Mom)
As I write this, I’ve got a 3 year old who is chalking up our patio the colors of Unicorn vomit, an 18 month old who won’t stop trying to hop onto my lap, and an enormously large fly…thing…hovering around my screen and giving me the stink-eye, contemplating the attempt at a hit-and-run attack on my face.
30 minutes.
It’d be nice to just have 30 minutes to myself in between the chaos of being a parent and getting personal work done.
Which made think of putting the kids on time-out, and then putting myself on time-out.
Rarely do we, as parents, take time out for ourselves.
We think we’re doing the honorable thing, the right thing, to always have our kids on our mind.
We’re not.
You need a mental break. Whether it’s for an hour or taking a day for yourself.
Between getting the kids ready for school and figuring out what the hell to feed them come dinner time puts the household and stress levels at DEFCON 1.
I’ve learned to somewhat manage the stress levels and just woosa things out — but that takes practice.
Sometimes, you just need to take a break, relax, regroup, and carry on just so you can make it another day.
Here’s 5 ways I’ve learned to manage stress levels and refuel on the virtue of parenting patience.
1. Napping
I don’t care how old you are, naps are awesome.
Not only because it feels good to take a nap, but there’s some interesting science behind taking an afternoon nap from boosted creativity and obviously reducing stress.
I find that a lot of the times when I would be really about something, I could just sleep it off, regroup, and start looking for solutions instead of worrying about what pissed me off in the first place.
It also helps you stay at peak mental and physical performance,while being good for your heart as well it would seem.
So, go ahead. Take please in sneaking a nap in — just make sure you don’t over do it.
Generally a 30-60 minute nap is ideal for boosting memory, learning, alertness, and productivity.
Here’s a pretty cool infographic on napping.
2. Reading
If you’re not currently reading a book right now — do it.
Pick up your Kindle, Nook, paperback, and find a good fiction book read.
Reading can actually help you reduces stress by 68%.
Here’s why…
Psychologists believe this is because the human mind has to concentrate on reading and the distraction of being taken into a literary world eases the tensions in muscles and the heart. — The Telegraph UK
I tend to buy more books than I have time to actually finish them, but when I do happen upon a book which completely sucks me into the story, you can find me lounging on the couch for hours and I find myself completely forgetting why I was stressed in the first place.
So GO READ A BOOK!
3. Walking (And Walking Away)
Admittedly, I don’t exercise as much as I’d like to. The motivation to exercise is there, but the motivation to execute isn’t…if that makes sense.
While I can’t always hit the gym or get motivated to work out at home, I’ll take a walk around the block a few times during the week.
It also gives me a chance to de-screen. I won’t bring my cellphone or music player. I’ll just walk, be in the moment, and notice what’s around me.
It’s a nice little breather to relax and just be away from it all for a little bit.
Also, when your kids are driving you insane because they’re fighting over the same toy (for the millionth time) or decided to have a Rumble Royale while you were trying to write, it helps to sometimes just walk away from the situation for a minute.
4. Get High (On Dopamine)
I know a few parents who smoke out like it’s still high school and that they’ve been doing it for so long, they just can’t feel normal feeling normal.
Hey, that’s all on you if you partake in it.
But I’m talking about getting high like the high you feel after an awesome run.
Jumping from a 50ft cliff into the ocean.
Roller coasters, playing sports, having sex.
Do more fun shit man.
I remember as a kid, I was always running around the neighborhood, climbing walls, trying to get to 88mph on my Huffy so I could travel back in time, and doing things that scared the hell out of me but were fun regardless.
I don’t do much anymore now that I’m a full time dad.
The excitement is gone and the “something to look forward to” is missing.
I’ll be looking for some exciting things to do, and so should you if you’re stuck in a rut as well.
5. Count To 10 (And Breeeeeathe)
Breathe.
Just Breathe.
A little trick I learned from reading Pyscho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz is to relax the muscles whenever you start to feel the stress and anger build up.
It seems strange, but by releasing the tension in your muscles, it causes your mind to calm down and the anger to subside.
No anger, no stress.
I’ve also added in the 10 second rule and deep breathing.
Whenever I start to feel the anger build up and the feeling of just blowing up, I take 3 deep, stomach expanding breaths, and count to 10 slowly.
I can usually calm down enough to think clearly, and find a good way to diffuse the petty argument my kids put up.
So there you go.
They’re not perfect methods, and I tend to forget to do most of what’s listed, but when I’m able to them, I found these methods to help get through another parenting day.
