Quality Time

Photo by Picsea on Unsplash

Spending time with our children is very important in strengthening our relationship with them, supporting their development and meeting their need to connect with us. It can feel overwhelming to set aside large chunks of time to spend with our little ones, especially if our schedules are busy and hectic. Sometimes we’re in the same room but distracted by the many different tasks that we need to get done. Sometimes we’re exhausted from a long day of work, and don’t have the energy to engage in a long play activity. Try just spending 10 minutes of undivided time each day connecting with your child. Here are some simple ideas you can try:

1. Colour or do a simple art activity. You can work on the same picture as your toddler, or work on your own, side by side. Notice what they’re doing, and comment on it. “I see that you used so many different colours!” Draw a picture together — you can take turns drawing something on a page. Try drawing a circle for a head, and see what they add!
2. Make a snack and eat together. Involve them by giving some age-appropriate responsibilities. Your toddler can try spreading butter or jam on toast, or sprinkling some salt or spices on whatever you are making.
3. Create a short bed-time routine. Read a few stories with your child before bed. Children thrive on structure and repetition, so being able to anticipate bonding time at night is great.
4. Sing songs, or listen to music. You can incorporate this in your bed-time routine if it’s a lullaby or calming song. Babies and young toddlers will really enjoy singing songs with you, especially with actions. For older children, play some music that you both like. You can play music on your smartphone and make it cozier by listening on headphones together but remember, this is more about spending time with each other, not the screen.
5. Follow their lead in play. Playing with our child helps us to see the world through their eyes. If you’re worried it will take a long time to complete an elaborate activity, you can offer some simple suggestions and let them choose; “I would love to play with you! Shall we play with your blocks, or your tea set?” They’ll probably want to keep the game going, and if you’re able to, go for it! If not, that’s okay. Emphasize how much you enjoyed the time with them and let them know you need to do something else. “This was so much fun! I love it when we can play together. Mommy/Daddy has to go get dinner ready, now, but I want to do this again tomorrow!”
6. Take the lead in suggesting a game with your child. If you as a parent/caregiver pick a game that you like doing, spending time playing it can be even more enjoyable for the both of you. Don’t take it personally if your suggestion is rejected — it may offer a space to collaborate and figure out a game together.

Spending quality time together will help you build that connection and attachment with your little one. It doesn’t have to take too much time or energy. Spending 10 minute quality chunks of time will feel less daunting. As the saying goes, “children spell love…T.I.M.E.”