Changes

Winston Churchill once said, “To improve is to change.” It was Friday, February the 13th, 2015 and I was sitting in a bus on my way to one of my favorite cities in Honduras, San Pedro Sula. I knew big things were about to happen.

I was only going to be here for the weekend, however, somehow, my friends convinced me to stay for the entire week and built the idea of moving to San Pedro Sula in a near future. On Wednesday, February 18th, 2015, I went to mass because it was the first day of Lent, Ash Wednesday. It had been so long since the last time I had been to church, but somehow, I felt I was in the right place, at the right time. With so much faith I asked God to please open any door that was closed in order for me to be able to move to San Pedro Sula.

Two weeks later, on a Wednesday, one of my friends from San Pedro, invited me to have lunch with her, for she was in Tegucigalpa and wanted to catch up with me. As I was getting ready, I received a call from my first supervisor at PartnerHero, he said, “Jeanette, we saw your application and résumé and we loved it, we would like to have an interview with you as soon as possible.” I told my friend about this and she said, ‘’Call him and tell him you will be there tomorrow morning, I’ll give you a ride.”

When I arrived the next day I realized, my life was about to take a dramatic turn. Fear invaded my being, but a divine calm took it’s place. I usually get extremely nervous before any interview, but for some reason, I was incredibly calm.

Every door I thought was closed, whispered, “Turn the handle whenever you are ready.”

As I started to work here, I remembered something I had totally forgotten, to honor that girl inside me. It helped me remember who I was before I cared for what I looked like. Before I knew the sting of rejection. Before I was told that I couldn’t, or that I wasn’t, or that I hadn’t. I am still that girl, before the roles, the labels, the pains.

I remembered to be the girl who lived simply. The princess of books she was never going to be tested on, but made her enjoy lives no one else could. The one who used to draw because she wanted to, not because she had something to prove.

I became the girl who listened quietly to her heartbeat and quickly fell asleep. That one girl who was not governed by money, or clocks, or any of the artificial restraints that humanity imposes on itself.

I was back to being that silent fighter I have always been. The one that could make an entrance and capture everyone’s eyes because she felt so confident of herself. I remembered my smile, the one that could light up the room.

I finally became that caring girl who in the dark, found light brighter than many ever see. The one who within herself, found loveliness, through the soul’s own mastery.

I decided to honor the girl who was boundless and infinite. For she, she is a goddess within me. I now honor the dreamer of improbable dreams.