33 Pro Tips From A New 33-Year-Old

I’m turning 33. I can’t guarantee that these tips will change your life, but they might at least momentarily improve it.

It’s my party, and I’ll blog if I want to.

33. Opt in to Facebook’s “On This Day” feature. It’s not good to dwell on the past, but there’s nothing wrong with lingering over good memories or remembering what your life was like on this day three years ago.

32. Marriage can change your life. If you find the right person, be not afraid.

31. Running isn’t as terrible as you think, and it’s way better than a heart attack in your 50s. Biking is also good.

30. Smile while you work. (whistling optional)

29. Don’t be the person who talks too much in meetings (or anywhere, really).
You are the reason we are rolling our eyes.

28. Every once in a while, you deserve a Cinnabon.

27. Sometimes animated GIFs, hashtags and memes are the best way to make your point. Even emoticons can have their place. #ButEverythingInModeration

26. A huge percentage of people have probably already stopped reading this list. Give things a sufficient chance before writing them off. And please keep reading.

25. Always leave a note. And always write a thank-you note. Bonus points if you physically mail it.

24. Cancer sucks, but it can teach you a lot about yourself and those around you. Still, do your best to avoid it.

23. Don’t lie.

22. Learn to dance. Doesn’t matter what kind, but try learning an actual dance with steps. I met my wife in a swing dance class. Who knows what might happen to you!

Actual footage of me and my wife dancing

21. Wear sunscreen. Did you read the tip about cancer sucking?

20. Bet on the Chicago Cubs in 2016. Curses aren’t real, but talented baseball teams are.

19. Take a lot of pictures, even if people think it’s annoying or pointless at the time. Take some video, too. Your children will thank you.

18. If your job isn’t making you happy, find one that will. Also, don’t rely on your job as your sole source of happiness.

17. Haha > LOL

16. Potbelly’s has an excellent secret menu.

15. Per capita, the best music was made in the 1990s and the 1960s. And there is a Beatles song for every emotion.

14. Lists with 33 items are long. Still with me? Good.

13. One man’s sarcasm is another man’s arrogance. Wield it wisely.

12. Send random texts or emails to people you care about and haven’t talked to in forever. You know how good it feels to be reached out to in that way — why not give someone else that feeling?

11. You should be jamming to Hamilton. Lin-Manuel Miranda was just on Fallon, so now you have no excuse for not knowing about this epic show.
Funny…but wrong.
10. Tweet your opinions — positive and negative — to institutional accounts. If they’re good at their job, you might get a free t-shirt or a free cookie.
Avoid mean tweets.

9. You don’t look cool when you dress inappropriately for cold weather, so wear a hat. You’re literally making the rest of us sick.

8. You’re never too old to go to Disney World. But you are way too old to wear mouse ears with your name on the back.

7. Keep a journal. I love reading (or cringing at) old entries, and I wish I had made journal-writing a habit.

6. A spoonful of peanut butter will cure hiccups. OK, so this one actually will change your life.

5. It’s a good time to start forgiving people.

4. Whenever you’re about to do something, think to yourself, “Would an idiot do that?” And if they would, do not do that thing. (h/t Dwight Schrute)

3. Give of your time, talent and treasure. That’s why you have it in the first place. (Also, always refer to your money as “treasure.”)

2. God loves you. Have faith.

1. Time flies.


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