Dr. Donald Garner: “In Our System We Start With Love”
In the realm of public discourse, few topics have sparked as much debate and contemplation as questions surrounding masculinity. Contemporary discussions on the subject tend to surround questions of why boys are falling more and more behind in educational outcomes, as well as how we can address toxic narratives of what it means to be a man in aims of reorienting towards a more positive form of masculinity. Boys, especially boys of color, underperform in K-12 education when compared to their female counterparts and higher education has also seen a floundering among men, with the makeup of both undergraduate and master’s degree attainment in the U.S. on average having a ratio of 60/40 female to male. With the struggles becoming more apparent and the solutions being blurry at best, Dr. Donald Garner gives a refreshingly clear starting point for addressing these deeply complicated issues “an ecosystem of love is necessary and critical to ensure young men of color are given the tools to thrive in life.”
Dr. Garner — a PH.D. in Social Work, Young Adult Pastor, and Founder/ Principal Consultant of Clark and Garner Consulting Firm — has spent much of his professional and academic career working to address the educational barriers faced by boys of color in K-12 education. His expertise and compassion make him a unique voice in the discourse surrounding masculinity. When I reached out to him for insight on the nuanced challenges boys and young men face today, his responses were not just academic; they were deeply personal.
During our conversation, Dr. Garner shared his formative years, describing the curiosity that fueled his interest in the struggles of boys in the K-12 space. “From high school, I had this curiosity about what was going on with boys and education,” he revealed. This curiosity evolved into a lifelong commitment to dismantling the obstacles that hinder the educational journey of young boys, particularly boys of color.
One of the key issues he highlighted was the pervasive cultural misunderstandings that hinder the progress of young boys. “Black boys are adultified from a young age; they aren’t treated as innocent or worthy of making mistakes,” he explained. It was evident that this observation was not just an academic insight but a heartfelt concern for the unjust treatment these boys endure. According to him, this misunderstanding of themselves leads boys of color to fall behind in school, perpetuating cycles of disadvantage. “Their ability to have a fighting chance to rise above their socio-economic status has historically been a struggle.”
He points out how differences in behavior between boys and girls in the classroom contributes to disparities in their performance. “Boys’ bad behaviors tend to manifest in ways considered less acceptable in a school setting — generally more outward, more violent, more physical — compared to girls, whose negative behaviors tend to be more internal, reserved, and pulled back.” This difference in tendency for how issues among male and female students manifest may lead to different treatment and by extension different outcomes. “Through my travels, much of what I was seeing was high suspension and expulsion rates of black and latino boys. I’ve always seen the school system failing black boys,” he lamented. His words carried the weight of years of observation and advocacy, highlighting his belief in the urgent need for systemic change in education.
In order to address these issues, Dr. Garner has taken several steps to put his academic understanding to action in ways that directly impact his community. With his work at the Eagle Academy — a network of six traditional public schools in New York City and Newark, NJ — he has consistently contributed to the improvement of academic success for boys of color. “The students always hear this quote “Once an eagle always an eagle”, It creates a community for these boys to feel like they have a place they can come back to”. This work sits in combination with services provided by his consulting firm where he develops educational curriculum, builds capacity in leadership and staffing development, and conducts research and evaluation activities, as well as other projects he works on including a recent action research grant he won with the International Boys School Coalition where the focus is on developing healthy masculinity among boys in K-12 schools.
During our back and forth, the pivotal role teachers play in the development of students was repeatedly reaffirmed. “It all starts at the K-12 space where a teacher has to recognize a child as being ready to join an accelerated track program; teachers are the gatekeepers of success,” he pointed out. In these words, there was a plea for educators to be not just instructors but advocates, recognizing the potential in every child, irrespective of their background. He discussed at length the importance of students feeling like their teachers cared and had faith in their ability to achieve great things. “The most successful educators begin from a position of loving students first, teachers who care about building relationships. In our system we start with love, find the people who match that philosophy, and support them in maintaining it”
Another concept Dr. Garner brought up several times was the hidden curriculum, which gave insight into the multifaceted factors that influence a child’s education. “Having parents with social capital, being in a complete family unit, having parents invested in getting their child to read during the summer — all these factors have huge effects on educational outcomes,” he emphasized. It was a reminder that education is not confined to the classroom; it encompasses the social fabric of a child’s life, underscoring the need for holistic approaches to bridge the gap.
This discussion of the effect of outside factors led us into the subject of toxically masculine spaces online and what about them was attracting young men today. For Dr. Garner, online spaces merely represented the newest manifestation of a phenomenon that had been observed for as long as male spaces have existed. “Young men are attracted to these spaces because historically that’s what they’re more likely to see and be exposed to”. He delved into the genealogy of young people’s masculinity, which includes family spaces, barbershops, and friend groups, all of which have been sites for reinforcing unhealthy standards of masculine norms. Was it really any wonder that in the age of ubiquitous online activity, spaces reflecting those same prevalent attitudes would appear and gain a following? For Dr. Garner, it is only through the process of getting men to recognize the roots and influences of where those beliefs in what it means to be masculine came from that we could change these things for the better. “Any space putting young men in a place where they can be reflective is a positive change.”
“Healthy masculinity relies on integration with a community,” Dr. Garner stated, stressing the need for meaningful interactions and communication. His approach extends to sexual education, where he advocates for teaching young men healthy ways to interact and communicate with women. “The status quo for masculinity in society is to pursue, to go after what you want”, pointing out how this leads to a culture where men push too much and fail to notice signs of discomfort when engaging with women. “Restraint shouldn’t be a demerit on their masculinity,” he asserted, showcasing his approach to addressing issues of consent deeply ingrained in societal norms.
Dr. Garner’s initiatives largely focus on reshaping societal perceptions. He incorporates music, a medium he’s deeply passionate about, to engage with students effectively. “There is a stigma of research being boring, which it is,” he chuckled, highlighting the need to make education and research exciting for the youth. He believes that by integrating music and creative approaches, research becomes not only accessible but also enjoyable. “We need to have a more sophisticated discourse on all our avenues of communication,” he went on to assert, capturing the essence of his mission. He believes that love, compassion, and understanding are the foundation stones for reshaping masculinity and providing young men with a future brimming with opportunities.
In a world where the toxic perceptions of masculinity still pervade, Dr. Donald Garner offers a beacon of hope, working to help lead the charge towards a brighter, more inclusive future for all young men. Through his relentless efforts, research, and strategies, he is not just addressing the struggles of boys of color but also attempting to reshape societal narratives, one compassionate step at a time.
