You never have to worry about accidentally sleeping in. Have you ever forgotten to set your alarm, finding yourself waking with an instant feeling of regret and urgency that brings the contents of your stomach to a rolling boil? With young children, you never need to worry about this again. In fact, newly born tiny humans will check your alertness every couple hours, ensuring you will not miss critical daily-and nightly-events. An alarm clock may fail you, but a two-year-old climbing on you, staring you in the face, and sticking their fingers in your wide-open mouth will be sure to do the trick.
You get to share everything! Have you ever eaten a candy bar and after finishing, felt bad for not offering some to those around you? Well, have no fear! Kids will change that. Even if the dreaded desire to greedily eat your own food takes over and you find yourself hiding in the closet to consume a bag of chips while your children are deeply entranced in their favorite TV show, they will never fail you. Kids have a sixth sense and will ensure that you never suffer from “I Feel Guilty Because I Did Not Share My Food Syndrome” again. And it does not stop at food! You get to share experiences too as well; reading quite books, sleeping, and going to the bathroom.
You never have to worry about your bed being too big. I know how had it can be to sleep in a bed that is simply too large. With children, you have an immediate fix to big bed-related sleeplessness. They will fill in all those extra spaces and more to help your bed feel as if you are sleeping in a taquito.
Home decor is never dull. Anyone can manage a perfectly clean, clutter-free look with enough time and determination. Only kids can give your home that unique touch that you never knew you needed. Who would have thought marker could add a new brilliance to your freshly painted white walls? You would never have imagined the visual impact of toys and clothes being scattered throughout your home. And the unique smells to freshen your home — smells that you certainly will not find in those fancy candle shops. If you are lucky, you will even encounter some smells that will linger with you long after you leave your home, enabling you to take those unforgettable memories with you.
You will never have to worry about burning your mouth on hot food again. By the time you get your child’s meal ready, make something else because they don’t like the first thing you made, clean up spilled drinks, and change their clothes because they somehow managed to get more food on their chest than in their mouth, your food will be cooled below any risk of mouth burning.
When they are young, you always have an extra set of hands. Everyone knows how much we can use a second set of hands when cleaning, cooking, and doing the bills. Children will make sure to help you accomplish these tasks in ways you never thought possible. Sure, there may be some additional work when the job is complete, but that is a small price to pay for an extra set of hands.
When they are older, they stay out of your way. As children grow, you may find them confining themselves to their rooms. This gives you plenty of space to do needed chores on your own. No matter how much you demand and plead for help, they understand how much you enjoy doing things like cleaning moldy food out of their carpet, taming socks with an odor strong enough to paralyze an elephant, and going on scavenger hunts for dirty dishes. No fears, they will not get in your way.
You never need to worry about being bored again. Everything from a simple trip to the grocery store to eating at a restaurant becomes an adventure. Who knew that how much fun striking up conversations with every random stranger you meet, refereeing bickering children in a shopping cart, and trying the pre-chewed gum in the nooks and crannies of store shelves could be?
Did you enjoy this parenting story? You may also enjoy these laughs by Erica Graham: