The Lighter Side of Having 5 Kids — Part 2
Staying sane while raising 5 children can sometimes require large doses of humor. This is my second installment of this series.
Luckily our children have made us laugh more times than I can count. Over the years, I’ve had multiple requests from my readers to share some of our mini-stories with others. Here are some of them from past years.
(Remember as you read to use the age-appropriate voices and pronunciations in your head — sometimes that’s the funniest part).
2012
My daughter (4 years old) came running into the kitchen.
Reagan: Where’s my letter? I need to take it to the post office!
Mom: What letter, Rea?
Reagan: I wrote a letter to Walmart telling them to give me 3 dolls.
*****
Reagan (4) came home from preschool one day and wanted to share something important that she’d learned.
Rea: Dad, I’ve got something to tell you.
Dad: What, Reagan?
Rea: Don’t ever be a potato couch!
Kelsey (13) : Rea, that would be a couch made out of potatoes!
Rea: I know! Look at the picture! See the potato?!
*****
My husband took the boys for haircuts and a treat at Shaggies. The next morning, Andy (3 years old) said:
“Thank you, Dad, for letting me sleep with my haircut!”
Like we were gonna say “leave your haircut out here in the living room when you go to bed”…
*****
Trying out the shock factor:
Andy (3): I sure hope I don’t say poop!…..OOPS, I said it!
<…5 minutes later….>
Andy: I sure hope I don’t say poop again!….OOPS!
It was an accident, Mom, honest…
*****
Reagan (4) paused while drawing something…
Reagan: Daddy? What’s your favorite color?
Daddy: Blue.
Reagan: No. I think it’s red!
*****
Reagan (4): Mom, I’m gonna sing Chris’s ABC song…A B C D E F G Barney is my enemy…
Andy (3): <with a know-it-all voice> Reagan — it’s EMENY!
Either way, you’re both right…
*****
As usual, we were at the restaurant just starting to eat and…
Andy (3): I have to go potty! I have to go potty!
Me: <sighing> ok, let’s go…
<in the stall>
Andy: <pushes on walls of stall> There’s no way out! We’re stuck!
Me: Yeah, yeah…come here…
Andy: <looking at the flusher handle> Is it gonna be loud?
Me: No, it won’t…
Andy: Well, good thing I don’t have to go to the bathroom!
Me: Pardon me?!
Andy: Good thing I don’t have to go to the bathroom!
Me: You’re gonna at least try- I’m missing my dinner for this!
Andy: <crosses his legs and arms and proceeds to inch forward a teeny hop at a time…>
Me: <grabs Andy and puts him on the toilet>
Andy: <muttering> That’s all the faster I could go…
*****
More little boy potty talk:
Andy (3):<climbing off the toilet> I ate some food and it came out poop!
*****
A six-year-old taking the rules literally:
Chris: Mom, why does dad take his drink in the car even though it’s against the rules?
Me: Why do you say that?
Chris: When we leave McDonald’s he takes his pop with him in the car.
Me: Well, he doesn’t let you kids do that because you might spill, but it’s ok for him to.
Chris: But, Mom! What if the cops see him drinking it?! It’s against the law to drink and drive!
Sir, put down that Pepsi and exit your vehicle, now!
******
(See the first article in this series here : https://blog.usejournal.com/the-lighter-side-of-having-5-kids-17242cfd94a2)
