Thoughts From A Nihilistic Child

Time is fleeting and meaningless. The order in which objects appear bears no meaning on their outcome. My homework will be complete when it’s complete.

I don’t care what clothes I wear! I am not defined by a pair of pants or what shoes are on my feet. Make sure when you go to Kohl’s to only get me items that are black, like my soul.

In no way can I sit in the back seat of the car for there is nothing there but bleakness. Fine, I will appease the fascist regime you call parenting and in protest I will kick your seat continuously.

These younger and older versions of me lack originality and yet here we are celebrating their birthdays . You cannot force me to play these trite games but I will take a piece of birthday cake, corner piece only.

If life were a road trip, your existence would be the rest stop. Pull over, I must pee.

If I must watch this dribble you call cinema then at least let me do it with a large popcorn.

Five Guys? Ugh, you could have picked a worst place. Whatever, everything is fragile and ending anyways. It matters not where we eat and I will just consume nothing to highlight the pain and suffering that is endless on this human condition. Fine, I’ll have some french fries.

<rolls eyes>

<sighs audibly>