Weird Cowboy Aphorisms

William S. Hart. The S was short for Scary.

A man can’t be both here and there unless somehow that man has been split in twine. And I do take issue with that.

That worm has wings and an ill disposition.

No sound is more inducing of terror than that of a mountain cat with the giggles.

A good doc can tell the dead from the none so. A bad doc can doom the case for statehood with a most terrible pestilence.

Guilt eats at you like a vulture — family and friends first.

Never turn down a fresh canteen or a chunk of satyr meat.

A hanged man should not be able to beckon you yonder with his toes.

Only thing worse than the heat of the desert is that block of ice within the desert. It got no business being there, and you got less business being near it.

Not every buffalo that lays dead plays nice.

Tumbleweed rarely, upon brushing your boot, latches on and whispers.

Keep your gun clean. That ghostly gunslinger keeps his.

Don’t fear that long black train. Most trains are black. The scary ones are painted green and they glow in the dark.

K’yarnak n’gha r’luh syha’h, pilgrim.