Things You Shouldn’t Say to Parents of Discerning Diners

We’re already crying over spilt milk over here

Image credit Avitalchn on Pixabay

Before I became a parent, people were always saying things like, “Parenting is the hardest job out there.” I always believed them. However, if someone had told me, “Feeding your child will be damn-near impossible. He will refuse buttered noodles and milkshakes. You will have to pack a suitcase for him with nothing but food when you travel abroad.” I would have laughed in their face. But the joke would have been on me.

Now that I have this kind of child, people are always saying other stuff to me — stuff that makes me want to rip off my skin and throw it into the ocean, or at least not talk to them for a few days.

Here are some things to avoid saying to the parent of a someone who is learning to like new foods*:

“Could you put it in a smoothie?”

A smoothie? You think my child will drink a smoothie? Like, made of fruit? The only acceptable fruits in our house are HEB brand organic applesauce in the red pouch or Dole mandarin orange slices, no sugar added. Sure, Linda. I’ll just pop some kale in there. He’ll never know.

“But have you tried CANNED green beans?”