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The A-Z of Finding Complete Love

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Ultimately we all seek love.

Love from the other, love from ourselves, love from the gods.

Love to sustain us, love to express ourselves, love to expand ourselves, and transform us into greater beings.

But love always comes with its fair share of obstacles.

It tries us, tests us, destroys us, and then creates us once again.

In our journey of seeking and experiencing love, we fall and rise, and fall and rise… And learn many lessons on the way.

But if we keep in mind a few essential concepts, we may just realise the truth of love faster.

Listed below are some ideas that may bring you closer to love, and help you completely immerse yourself in the feeling…

A — Acceptance

The first step to love is acceptance… Acceptance of yourself, acceptance of the other, and acceptance of a supreme being greater than yourself — safe in the knowledge that your passage will be taken care of. When you accept that your life is in better and safer hands, the journey toward love becomes easier.

B — Being

Love is about being with yourself, being with the moment, being yourself, and allowing the people and world around you to be the way they are too. As you surrender to this knowledge, you become a more peaceful and secure being, able to love more fully and freely.

C — Compromise

Give and take is the way of the world, and the way of love too. As you take a little, you give a little. Even if you don’t take at all, and only give, know that you are only growing into a more loving being in the process. Selflessness and service come from an approach of compromise — both necessary ingredients for love.

D — Desire

A desire to hold on, and then let go… A desire to meet, and then part… A desire to know, and still know you don’t know it all… Desire leads to knowing the dualities of love…of knowing that you are here and still not here, that you will go, but a part of you will still remain… Desire is the seed of all love.

E — Energy

Everything in life needs energy, energy for its creation, sustenance and preservation. In the case of love, this energy needs to be positive, emanating from a space of inner well-being. As you tap into your inner energy, you are able to radiate that energy to the world too.

F — Forgiveness

Forgiveness allows us to move ahead in your journey with a sense of peace and love in your heart. If you hate and hold prejudices, the ability to love will only diminish…if not disappear totally. It’s essential then to release all traces of hurt, anger, betrayal, and any other negative feeling — toward the other and yourself — to make more space for love.

G — Generosity

The bigness of your heart will be tested again and again… But know that the more you give, the more joy and ecstasy you will feel. Generosity in love could mean giving your complete attention and time, and sharing bits and pieces of your life with the other. And to experience complete love, generosity often translates into giving all you have unconditionally and wholeheartedly.

H — Honesty

Be honest with yourself...because when you’re dishonest with yourself, you’re dishonest with others. Hence, introspect and question if you are living any lies — These could be a way of life that doesn’t work for you anymore, people you are not in sync with, or environments that don’t support love… When you address these issues honestly, you let go of the past, and make space for a future filled with more love.

I — Intimacy

Intimacy is essentially about allowing the other into your space… Intimacy is about being ‘one’ with the other, being able to empathise, and stay present together, in a space that may make either vulnerable. But when you decide to come together in that space of vulnerability, you let go of all the love you held on to…and embrace the other with compassion and love.

J — Joy

A feeling of joy is synonymous with love. Love can’t exist without joy. Of course love will bring pain too…but to eventually lead to more joy. But where does that joy emanate from? Where does love itself emanate from? From you… Thus, to make your life more joyful, and eventually your love more joyful, find joyful practices to incorporate into your life.

K —Kindness

Kind thoughts, kind words, kind deeds take love forward. But does love give birth to kindness or does kindness give birth to love? They both co-exist. As you become a gentler person, reducing the resistance within you and outside of you, adding kindness to everything you do, the feeling of love becomes more complete.

L — Laughter

Laughter, wholehearted laughter, without holding back, allows you to embrace the complete feeling of love… If you’re not laughing enough, know that you’re not loving enough. It’s only love and peace that allow for more laughter…So start looking at the brighter side, the lighter side of life, and infuse more love into your life.

M — Melancholy

Love is also melancholic. It will make you think, question, wonder. And through it all, you will become stronger in your conviction of it, and stronger in your ability to love more. So don’t evade melancholy, sit with it, and hold it, till it puts more light on your path of love.

N — Natural

Any outpouring of love is a natural one… You won’t know what triggers it, you won’t know what sustains it, you’ll just know that it simply is. In it’s most simple and natural form, love is the purest and most real — with no demands, no expectations, no nomenclatures, and no pretenses…just pure natural unadulterated love!

O — Optimism

Where there is love, there is hope… There is the will to never give up…to know that everything will turn around, and become love once again. Love is an eternal optimist…and no one can take away that quality from it.

P — Persistence

In love, persistence is not about pursuing a result, but in knowing that persistence itself is the result. Very often love is already a lost battle, especially if seen in context to the other… That’s when persistence comes into play — when you realise that the act of loving itself is the reward.

Q — Quest

The life quest for greater meaning is nothing but a seeking for complete and everlasting love. But it’s a long journey before you accept the ways of love, or even begin to know the ways of love… Love is thus a never-ending quest, a seeking of answers…to eventually know that it all lies within you.

R — Romance

You can romance the stars, the moon, the sun, the flowers, the river, the whole galaxy… When in love, you look at everything in wonder, and when this sense of wonder permeates your very being, everything around you resonates with romance and love…You woo it, and it woos you back… Love is not only romantic love, love is the ability to romance everything!

S — Serenity

Love is the ability to just be, to know that love itself is enough, to know that you are enough… To know that you don’t need to do anything, or say anything or feel anything, but simply be with your full self, your mindful self... Serenity can only be found within you, when you have the courage to love yourself deeply.

T — Tolerance

Tolerance is knowing that everything is indivisible and one, and emanates from the same life force. Tolerance is not about just seeing godliness in the other, but knowing deep within that everything in the world is a reflection of that one supreme consciousness. Only when you reach that state of oneness, can you feel complete love.

U — Unlimited

Love has no limits, love has no end and no beginning. What has touched you once, will touch you again…because the essential core of love remains the same. If you’re doling out love in bits and pieces, know that you haven’t yet tapped into that unlimited force of love within you…the ability to love all and love completely.

V — Virtuosity

‘Love conquers all’ is a saying. Its ability to conquer comes from its virtuosity. From its inherent capacity to transform those it touches, and help them transcend the limitations of their beings. Virtuous love is a love of complete surrender, knowing that the path to love can only make you more complete.

W — Wisdom

You start out as a fool in love, but eventually become wise. It’s probably love’s ability to help us grow up… But that very wisdom also shows us that love will only sustain itself if it’s childlike, innocent, and spontaneous… Love’s wisdom helps us start all over again, looking at love with fresh eyes eyes, every time it threatens to leave us.

X — eXcitement

That little flutter in your heart, that beat that gets stronger, that surge of excitement when you are gazed upon by the eyes of love… Love is excitement, excitement that keeps you alive… Allow this excitement to enter you, touch you, and transform you. Only with this excitement can the beauty of love unfold.

Y — You

You are the sole beneficiary of love, and you are the giver of love too… As you let love touch every aspect of your being, you become extraordinary…you become light and joy… Love does not exist without you, love does not exist outside of you. Know that you are the source of love, and that you are love itself… To seek it you need to go nowhere, all you need to do is look within.

Z — Zero

Love can only be felt when you are in a ‘zero state’ of feeling — a state of complete nothingness and emptiness… To feel love you have to slowly let go of everything that is holding love back. You have to overturn your vessel, and get ready to hold nothing…before you can hold and contain love. Love is created from nothingness and goes back into nothingness. Love is zero…

The expression of love is probably the most beautiful form of expression, urging us to break barriers and move into the unknown.

What’s your most cherished form of expression, and how would you like the world to respond to it?

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Ritika (Bajaj) Lalwani

Ritika (Bajaj) Lalwani

Writer-editor, seeker, yoga enthusiast, tarot reader, voyager… and more