A First Encounter: Discovering BTS
How I gained my happiness back
Since my younger school days, most of my peers were music enthusiasts. We would have K-Pop stans, Beliebers, Directioners, Swifties, and many more. As a child, the only music exposure I had was through my mother’s car radio or the tiny radio in my room. Due to that, I was pretty much only exposed to the “top hits”.
Growing up and out of different friend groups, I realized how I was adapting my own music tastes to each of them. I had gone through phases of SNSD (Girl’s Generation), The Chainsmokers – Halsey – Big Bang, K-Pop girl groups (Red Velvet – Twice – Blackpink), and then a bit of a combination of Joji – Post Malone – Drake. While in this current world situation, I found myself struggling to figure out which sort of music I “vibe” with the most, but the last one seemed to stick with me; most probably because I had an attachment to the playlist that connects me with my closest friends.
When the pandemic dawned upon us, life in general became dull and restrictive. I think deep down, it was terrifying for everyone to see such a situation hit the world; and all I could think of was to better play my part and stay home. The time I have spared during the day, I would play mobile games with my closest friends while making several new friends. The aforementioned playlist then accompanied us, as we went through in-game matches all night (not the best habit, I know) while also reminding us of the good old pre-pandemic days.
Life became alright I guess, but one day I stumbled upon some videos on YouTube.
Somehow, I had never thought to check artists that I listen to on Youtube (yeah, I really don’t know why either). A 3-part series had me intrigued on a certain group whose music I had been introduced to in different parts of my life before (who hasn’t really?).
It was BTS.
Seeing their goofy, chaotic selves in award shows and interviews in the US had me fascinated. It was back in 2016 that I was introduced to Blood Sweat and Tears and then 2018 to Fake Love. TBH, I probably heard a lot more BTS songs that I just didn’t realise (sadly).This realization happened as I was streaming all their songs on Spotify. Spring Day, Just One Day, Boy with Luv, and DNA were some memorable ones; it was as if a lightbulb in my brain went off!
I vividly remember spending time till the crack of dawn, falling deeper into the purple universe and telling myself that all I wanted to do was know their names.
It’s a new day, and I did more content-binging on their late night show interviews, MVs, and some YouTube compilations. Some other videos that drew me into them were the Carpool Karaoke, the performance of ON at the Grand Central Station and their UN Speech. It took less than 24 hours and that was it. I knew I had to stan. It was difficult not to!
Only having one friend I could relate with on BTS, I spent a few more days drowning in their content before resorting to stan Twitter and make wonderful, new ARMY friends. Updating on current happenings and sharing pictures (whether recent or old ones), BTS is what essentially bonds us together. They are the best thing that happened to me in 2020, as we provide each other with serotonin while guiding me through Twitter as a baby ARMY.
Even with my lack of knowledge about the music industry, I noticed a discrepancy between BTS’s quality of work and how they are perceived or portrayed in the mainstream media. This triggered enough curiosity to find out more about them and the music industry in general. I learned from various sources while also doing my own research on how things work both in the music industry in general and in the K-Pop industry. What a world it is out there. You have the K-Pop industry being ruled by veteran entertainment companies and the western music industry choosing to be xenophobic towards BTS when possible.
Before BTS (under Big Hit Entertainment) became a household name in South Korea, the industry was dominated by larger, more influential agencies. For lesser known companies in general, it was difficult to survive and compete against industry giants. For BTS to have gone through things such as sajaegi (chart manipulation) accusations and a whole lot of unnecessary hate but still be able to rise to the top, it truly shows good people with good intentions will have the universe on their side.
This leads me to believe that people get what they give, and to do things with good intentions in mind. They have been wronged by so many out there but they simply chose to move on from each incident and proved themselves to the world, which I really admire as they show it instead of simply talking about it without meaning. It established a belief in me that what goes around, comes around.
It’s nothing different with the western music industry either; for instance radios still chose to not to play BTS’ Korean songs (a lot of spins for Dynamite though) despite amazing sales and streaming numbers that indicate a lot of interest in them.
Last year, Dynamite debuted No. 1 on the Billboard Hot100 charts and spent a consecutive week there, a first for BTS and only the 20th song in the chart’s history to have achieved this. In that period of time, they released several remixes of Dynamite to help push the song on the charts; which was nothing new and was a strategy that had been employed by other artists too.
It was a dream of theirs to be able to achieve No. 1 on the Billboard Hot100 since they were young and starting out. It took 7 years, but they finally had one of their dreams fulfilled: their song topping the Billboard Hot100 chart; and it was quickly followed by another dream that was fulfilled — to have one of their Korean songs reach No. 1 in the same chart, which they achieved when they released Life Goes On just two months later.
As ARMY all over the world celebrated and gave each other pats on the back for our hard work, I felt like I couldn’t quite comprehend yet how big of a deal this is to BTS, ARMY, and the whole music industry. Thankfully, ARMY are always ready to share how much this means to them, giving several perspectives which resulted in me making a personal mission to contribute as much as I can if it means breaking more barriers and spreading more empowering messages to the world.
Nevertheless, they have gone against all the odds and are currently Billboard Hot100 No. 1 AND a Grammy-nominated artist (which was another dream of theirs). I think the universe is on BTS’ side 😌
Along the way, they always make sure to celebrate and thank ARMYs: for helping them achieve their dreams while going on this journey with them. Sometimes I thought about how much they have impacted my life in such a short time, and that I didn’t feel like I deserved the love and comfort they have provided us with. Now I like to think of it in a different way; how the BTS-ARMY relationship feels fairly equal, that they deserve our love and us accepting theirs in return. Got to start stanning artists that love you back 💜
Coming into the fandom, I was aware as to what calling myself an ARMY would bring. Some “ughs” and “omg not you”s were brought upon me by several friends. Hearing that left me quite an unsettling feeling – angry almost, as it felt like they dismissed how happy BTS has made me and how my life felt quite literally turned around. I’m not too bothered by it as of now, and chose to interact less with those friends. I thought I wouldn’t need to be anxious whenever they started bringing up how “obsessed” I am, as I consider both BTS and ARMY as family. I never was picky with friends to begin with but I learned that just like BTS, I just have to move on from people that aren’t good for me.
ARMY does get an unpleasant rep for being an obsessive, overprotective, and toxic fanbase. It is incredibly huge with different sides to it as we are not one big entity; but a diverse community including people of various ages and backgrounds, thus making it unavoidable for negativities and disagreements to exist from both inside and outside the fandom. And the overprotectiveness stems from the ridiculous amount of mistreatments that BTS had gone through in the past, so it is understandable for ARMY to watch how BTS is treated like a hawk.
I have entirely mixed feelings with stanning, between being upset with myself for not coming into the fandom sooner (could’ve started in 2016!!) or just really ecstatic to be here on this journey with them now. A lot of people claimed to have left the fandom for reasons such as “the fandom is too toxic” or “preferring their old music as their current ones sound very westernized”. I still don’t have a certain “taste” for music, but none of BTS’ songs are a skip for me. With an extensive discography, it is quite easy to curate your own playlist; mixing and matching songs to suit a certain mood yet that could still change everyday.
It has been 5 months since I started stanning but I am and will always be here for BTS and their music; supporting them in all they do and respecting their decisions no matter what till the end. They really are seven in a million and the best thing to have happened to me in quarantine. All their content & music (7 years worth!) brought positivity and happiness back to my soul, quite literally saving me. I have learned to let go of some of my past anxieties and to love myself, leading me into a euphoria I haven’t really experienced since I was a young girl.
For ARMYs reading this, I guess I’ll see you in 2039 😉
