J-Hope: Getting To Know The Sunshine Personified

When I first began to know BTS, J-Hope was the one member I had a hard time understanding the most. “How can someone be so happy ALL THE TIME?! This can’t possibly be real, right?” I thought to myself. As a teacher, I also perform my teacher self for my students. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not being insincere, but I definitely censor myself and make sure I keep my expression open and approachable when I’m in front of the class. After a day of teaching, I usually feel spent from this effort. So to see J-Hope nearly always ON when he’s on screen, I can’t comprehend how he can consistently find the energy to sustain his public persona.

So I observed this lovely ball of energy, but held him at an arm’s length, admiring his work, his skill and his beauty, but always wondering at the back of my head, “How does he do it?”. Maybe there is a part of me that hopes (haha) that if I can figure it out, I would be able to get back my spark for teaching that had waned at that point. I used to leave classrooms tired, but happy. At the beginning of 2020, I seldom felt the happiness and mostly just felt wiped out.

I wondered what others felt about J-Hope, so I asked my fellow purpling creators. I found that though they approach his persona from different facets, there is a consensus that J-Hope represents warmth, brightness, and tenacity.

A couple of purpling creators love how J-Hope patiently guides members in choreography, helping them through difficulties, while others are impressed by his versatility as an entertainer and his work ethic. And we all agree that he brightens-up a room as soon as he enters, whether because of how he carries himself, how he treats others, and how he responds to his environment.

Going back to the beginning of my experience with BTS, I became ARMY in November 2019, and by January 2020 I dove into Twitter in anticipation for Map Of The Soul: 7’s album release roll out. As a baby ARMY in the babiest sense, I had no idea what to expect. And then Interlude: Shadow came like a punch in the gut, followed by Black Swan. And I became slightly concerned, is this what the new era is going to be like? A deep dive into darkness?

Baby ARMY as I was, I understood that what Bangtan sang always came from an authentic space, it was what drew me to them in the first place. I did not, however, understand yet the extent of which they documented their experiences, and how this allowed them to explore experiences they’ve moved on from and use their art as an opportunity to examine said experience with a healthy detachment, or even perhaps use the creation process so they could achieve a state of healthy detachment. The latest example of this was perhaps when Jin released Abyss as a gift on his birthday along with an explanation about the process he went through when he created it.

Then on February 2nd 2020, Outro: Ego was released, and my heart soared. There was a sense of coming full circle from Intro: Persona, Interlude: Shadow, and then Outro: Ego. In Persona, RM acknowledged the persona he shows the public and how it is a facet of his identity and is rooted in his authentic self. In Shadow, SUGA told us about confronting his Shadows head on, listening to them as they are — embracing them. In Ego, J-Hope sang about observing his persona and shadows and continuing on because there is gratitude that he’d got the chance to do so. So if the album was a map, these three songs are check points of their journey, and Outro: Ego is their final port for this leg of their journey.

Oh and what a port it is. Outro: Ego is the sonic embodiment of J-Hope, and the lyrics helped me understand him better. Through this song, I felt like I truly met him. The song, though festive and celebratory in sound, puts forward lyrics that are deeply reflective.

Whatever I believed,

wherever I went,

became my fate

and became my core

Whether or not I was exhausted

or whether or not I was sad,

it became my comfort,

and help me know myself

Outro: Ego, BTS; trans cr: doolsetbangtan

I see here his perception of the crazy reality he has to live everyday as an artist whose every move is watched by the world. I also see his acknowledgement that there are sad realities he’ll have to live with, but that ultimately he has learned and will continue to learn from his experiences and that he is thankful for his opportunities.

From then on, I began to really look into BTS’s past work, and from J-Hope specifically, this strong sense of gratitude for having the opportunity to create and have his creations entertain people seem to be his source of power. He has a keen awareness about his capability to exude joy and imbue his surroundings with levity, and he recognises the importance of such a presence in people’s lives.

Reflecting on this, I now feel encouraged to truly examine my feelings about teaching. I know I love education and learning, but I wonder if the traditional classroom is something I want to come back to now that I know that people learn through many different media — often more effectively. I wish to make sure that I choose based on “… answers from those I trusted the most”.

I hope that somehow, J-Hope realises that his existence has helped at least one person to have more courage in facing herself, and I’m certain I’m not alone.

My fellow purpling creators also shared their favourite J-Hope moments, anecdotes, and quotes. For tan, watching BTS practice gave her a chance to see J-Hope in his element, showing his strong drive and mesmerising movements. While Puri often thinks about his expression when whole stadiums full of ARMY chant his name during his solo set.

While Bita and Beebo chose snippets from behind the scenes and an interview. Bita just loves how he asserts, “Ah, crying doesn’t fit with my life’s vibe”, in minute 3:09 of the linked Bangtan Episode. Beebo, on the other hand, loves his reply of “I don’t care”, when asked what he would do if he messed up on stage by James Corden. Both of these quotes highlight how Hope handles challenges with grace.

Nasha and Wanda love J-Hope’s lyrics. Wanda cannot get Dionysus’ lyrics about the pain of creation out of her head, while Nasha has his part in ON as her rousing call when she faces a challenge.

Anya keeps his class of 2020 speech close to her heart because it shows J-Hope’s perspective about effort — how success is never due to a one time effort, rather it’s a result of a series of attempts.

“I decide to trust myself. The next attempt might not be perfect, but the second is better than the first and the third is even better than the second and that is the moment I decide, I’m glad I chose not to give up.” - J-Hope, BTS Commencement Speech, Dear Class of 2020

And I love this part of his Weverse Magazine interview.

“If you can’t do it now, you can always do it later. Do that, and you can put your mind at ease. And I think that’s the secret to living a long, happy life. Anything you can’t do in your 20s, you can just do in your 40s. … Try again later if you can’t enjoy yourself now. You’ll probably feel different in the future anyway. “ - J-Hope, BE comeback interview, 24 November 2020

Looking at the moments and lyrics we resonate with, it seems that J-Hope brings joy, comfort, and tenacity to the forefront. Truly, in return for all the love we have received from him, we wish only the best for our beloved sunshine. And these are the messages we have for him in celebration of his birthday!