What Cleft?
As I write this, you are almost three years old and loving life…slaying life really. It has been a while since I wrote about your journey, my tenacious girl, but we’ve been full steam ahead and living through a worldwide pandemic since your surgery in August of 2019.
Most days I do not even think about your cleft or the challenging and difficult journey we were on back then. You are strong, sassy, unyielding, and very strong-willed, which are all traits that have served you well these past three years. Mothering you through this season of your life has been one of the greatest privileges God has ever bestowed upon me.
After you were born at almost 41 weeks, weighing in at a whopping 9 lb 2 oz, you had some respiratory issues and spent a couple of weeks in the NICU. Once home, we began our frequent appointments with Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta craniofacial clinic. You were fitted for a NAM (a nasoalveolar molding device, that fit in your mouth much like a retainer) to begin training your nose to be in an upright position. You wore that pretty much nonstop until your surgery at six months of age!
At each point along the way, you far exceeded all of our expectations, and once we got past your surgery, life began feeling much more normal. No more regular cleft clinic appointments, no pesky NAM, and feeding became much easier.
Fast forward to last week when we finally had a follow up with the cleft team (which was pushed back several times because of the pandemic), you aced your speech evaluation and are saying letter sounds that even your big siblings at this point were not able to perfect. The surgeon said he was so happy with the shape of your nose and your scar. He will do a scar revision procedure on your lip in a couple of years to make it even more seamless, but in my eyes, you are perfection. There is a small cleft or gap in your gum line, but you have all your teeth! Eventually, they will do a bone graft when your permanent teeth start coming in to fill in that gap where your cleft is now. In summary, you are doing amazing!
Otherwise, we are dealing with what most other kids and parents are dealing with at this stage: big girl transitions, preschool, sibling relations, and figuring out how to be a little person in a big world. Those traits I saw in you even as an infant (sassy, stubborn, fierce, and independent) have only strengthened as you have gotten older. You do not easily back down. You know what you want. You sometimes steamroll to get it, and you know how to sweetly manipulate your parents to get your own way! Your temper can flare in an instant but so can your gentility and compassion.
Being your mama is both fantastic fun and frustratingly challenging at times, but I am so proud of the little lady you are becoming. There is no doubt in my mind God has mighty big plans for you, my girl. The very next season, in fact, will require you to start wearing the hat of “big sister!” You are so excited to welcome a new baby girl into our family. You have been preparing for months by taking great care of your baby dolls, talking to my belly, and telling anyone who will listen about becoming a big sister. I know you will usher in this new season with great excitement and vivacity! This new baby girl will be fiercely loved (and probably bossed around a lot too.)
When I think back to that month during my pregnancy with you when we found out about your cleft, I remember the fear and anxiety over the unknown future, but now, I cannot imagine life any other way. God used that time to strengthen us both, show us that we were stronger than we thought, and bring about a compelling story of love, perseverance, and redemption in our lives.
You’ve only scratched the surface of God’s amazing grace and faithfulness, beautiful girl. Your story is just beginning.
