Why an anxiety crisis was the best thing that happened in my life?

In 2015 I was on my second year in the Textile Industry, after moving from Trainee to Process Supervisor everything was being great. My 1st year was awesome, I achieved my goals, got a promotion and also got my Black Belt certificate. 2nd year I had more responsibility in the company, I had the feeling that people trusted me and that I was on the right track.

It was February, I had just gotten back from a very good holiday in Ireland, just started a relationship with who would become my wife later in the same year! 2015 had everything to be the best year of my life!

I haven’t realised so far but after a few months something was different, I couldn’t figure out what was making things different, but I could feel! I was immature at the moment, 26 years, 4 years of professional experience, I thought that was just a moment in life, in the company.

But I was wrong, something inside me had changed, and I hadn’t understood that at that moment. The consequences of my immaturity made me lose focus, lost confidence in myself, stoped planning, lack of organisation, I was a mess.

The day was a Sunday, I probably will never forget, I couldn’t sleep that night, I had that anxious feeling which makes your mind change thoughts as a kid change toys, my blood ran in my veins as Bolt ran 100m, my body temperature was like a freaking rollercoaster, my heartbeat was craziness and then, I lost my mind.

That, in fact, was a Panic Attack, that day I thought that I would lose everything that I had built so far. I even started to rethink my whole life plans. For someone who was always confident of being an effing rock, which nothing could break, that was scary as hell!

Two days later I was diagnosed with an Anxiety Crisis, I had 2 options, therapy or medicines. For a person who always had a preconception of therapy, I was surprised when I started to do it, and to be honest, if I haven’t decided for It, maybe I would never learn what follows.

1 — Limits are there, and must be respected (Which does not mean that they could not be overcomed)!

Before my anxiety crisis, I was that kind of guy who is very tough, demanding too much from myself, always thinking that any second that I wasn’t learning something or doing something was a waste of time. Always pushing myself and the others more than They and I could support! I thought that everyone, including myself, was a superhero.

Well, that is by far not true, I understood that everyone defines their own limit, and everyone deserves respect for that. Instead of pushing myself to be better each second, I now use my time to understand why I couldn’t be better than I expected, now I learn with the process instead of blaming myself.

The same applies to whoever that couldn’t achieve something that I asked, instead of judging people, blaming them and stoping have reliability on them, I now take time to understand that person, his/her personality, what they are good/bad at, why they couldn’t achieve what I expected.

In the end, I realised that yes, people can be Superheros, but only if they want to, sometimes they want to be on the other side of the fence and they do have my respect for that.

2 — Don’t just ask, explain why (And be prepare to be challenged)!

B.A.C. (Before anxiety crisis) I couldn’t understand why people didn’t have the same commitment that I had, why they sometimes just didn’t care and did their jobs/tasks as just anything else. It was so simple for me to get why what was asked was so serious, I couldn’t figure out why people simply didn’t care!

Well, in fact, the world just not turns around my mind, people weren’t inside my brain, they could never have the information that I had if it wasn’t said. Because of that, they couldn’t understand the purpose of everything, why things were so important and people relate to purpose, not to tasks, neither to meaningless jobs.

By explaining the purpose you get people by heart and their commitment will be stratospheric, they will challenge yourself to be better, to find even more reasons to believe in your purpose!

But be careful, sometimes doesn’t matter how much you explain or how good you are preaching, you may never get some people as missionaries, simply because they don’t relate to your purpose and that is okay, you must not judge them, people have different cultures, mores, childhood, several things make one different from the other and there is no right or wrong, just different, you must respect that

3 — Don’t be so bonded to your Life Plan (And please have a Purpose for Life!)

B.A.C. I was that kind of person who had my whole life planned for the next 30, 40 years, even worst, if I saw any plan getting out of the rails, I would focus all my energy to put that back on track, my steps were millimetric planned and I was super bonded to it!

Better than being ultra bonded to your plan use it as a guide, not as a must happen. It is good to have plans, but if something goes different from what you expected, that is also good, you don’t have control of the whole world in your hands, it is pretty impossible to manage so many variables, you would die trying (Or get an Anxiety Crisis).

I also realised that my life plans were much more pleasant when I understood my purpose, which gave me a new way of planning, focused on an Income rather than an Outcome. I do have a purpose for life now, something that I want people to recognize me for. And well… my steps don’t need to be millimetric decided anymore!

4— Smile (Doesn’t matter when, or why), life is way more than seriousness!

I was a happy person, I would smile every second if I could, but bad moments were bad moments, not time to laugh about, neither put a smile in my face. I used to grieve for what I couldn’t do, what I fail, I thought that was a good thing, part of my learning process, creating a scar in my brain!

I was wrong, failing is not bad, not be able to achieve something is not bad as well, actually is incredible, it means that you have a lot to learn yet. Today I smile when I fail, I set my mind to see the good side of every failing moment, there is always something really impressive and important to learn from that. In the end, life will be way happier and easier! Learning is the only way to achieve your life purpose (Or life plan).

You may be facing an Anxiety Crisis right now or almost there, or maybe will never face it (Good for you), be sure about one thing, it is not easy but is by far the best thing that my work gave me in 2015, I wasn’t wrong, in fact, 2015 was a great year, if it wasn’t 2015 I couldn’t achieve one of my life goals in 2019, I may never got married on that year and I would not found myself professionally in 2016!

Because I know that I will never face you again, I thank you, Anxiety Crisis, to make me learn so much, I do own you a lot!