Candy Corn Poem #2
The porn was divided by state,
and it ran the gamut, like you’d expect.
It had “intro to psychology” all over it.
You could guess the reasons for days,
but all the data could be fake anyway.
I want the same but for treats,
what people actually like,
not what they click on for $10/hr. in a lab.
Before statistics, people were stupid
and thought others were bad faxes,
smeared down both sides but legible.
Let’s all take a minute to promise
we’ll never lie on a form ever again,
so we can get at who really likes candy corn
(and any other unnatural sex acts).