“Falling”
When I was a child…my mother would tell me to tie my shoes or I would fall
Often too involved in my activity I would ignore her warning
Step on the lace and hit my face
Against the wall
Or teeth to carpet
I can taste the slight taste of dust just thinking about it
When I got older, I was awkward and clumsy
So my shoes could be tied, they could be the perfect fit
And I’d still find some way to trip
I would walk over my own left foot with the right one
Or turn and hit the wall, kick the wall as if it could feel my pain
Like it deserved it
Knowing it was my fault for not being more careful
At 30 I realize I love like that
When I should tie my emotions to caution
I get too involved in the excitement and run too wildly, too free
And I step on my untied emotion and fall flat on my face
I see the walls my crush puts up, get distracted by her friendship
Turn and hit that wall face first
Well my face hurts
And I’m tired of tripping
I sit staring at my bruises wondering
What was the point of it all
But I never question anymore why they call it falling
I fell for her, I fell for her so hard
I damn near broke my jaw
I don’t wanna speak
I don’t wanna eat
It hurts too much to chew these emotions
Of regret
Of acceptance
Of friendship
I hate how close she wants to be with me
But not be with me
I taste this carpet instead of her lips
And it irks me that I have to get use to this taste
Cause I can’t get up
It may be funny when Urkel says it
But it ain’t so funny that I mean it
I’ve fallen
And I can’t…get up
_